Lost in his Songs
by Drbieber
Summary: A Justin Bieber Love Story, Being Justin Bieber's best friend is great, Going on tour with him is the best feeling in the world, just spending good quality time with Justin. But too much quality time can lead to deeper feelings and more drama…
1. Chapter 1

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

"Hollie, Justin, Jaden where about to go, where are you" offcourse, Kenny again, nagging us to get off the computer and back on the road. We've stopping in Malibu Justin has another big concert here tonight and we all got to get off to sound check. Well, not me off course Justin and Jaden, I just there to keep them company. This is Justin's third concert in a row, and I can't believe that he's not tired, still as energized as when we got on the bus two weeks ago. "Hey, Hollie come here for a sec" Justin calls from the back of the bus. "Sit down, I need to ask you something alright?" the moods kind of getting a little tense and awkward and I don't know how to act, he come closer, and whispers in my ear "I hate you" Justin cheekily says with a laugh "Justin your such a boy!" a laugh and push him away. Scooter walks in the room "what you love birds up to this time?" this is about the third time today, scooter has made one of these comments but me and Justin don't really care, "good on ya scooter" Justin replies whilst winking at me.

We arrive at the arena, security everywhere as normal, Justin holding my hand as normal. People find it weird how we hold hands and talk lovey dovey to each other but we always have, it's not weird to us. Jaden appears from around my shoulder and holds my hand to and says "didn't want to feel left out," just like always theirs thousands of fans, I mean thousands. Justin hugs a few, gives a few signatures make some girls cry, I find it so funny how girls can be so obsessed with him and their so jealous of me, I don't get what's to be jealous of!

I'm sitting in the third row from the front watching Justin perform, do his usual swag. Like normal behind my back Jaden appears

"Hey, you wish you where that one less lonely girl dontcha" he chuckles

"Oh yeah, I love him so much, I want him so badly" I say sarcastically

"I wish you where my one less lonely girl, hollie?" he whispers

"What" I say confused

"Oh nothing, I got to go, sound check ya know!"

Well, that was weird. Was he flirting with me, in the corner of my eye I see Justin wink at me and wave me back stage.

"Hey shawty, how you doing baby" he does as he gives me a huge hug

"Oh dr Bieber, I sure got that fever"

We both sit down, he put his hand on my knee and we start to talk about his concert tonight. When Jaden appears and starts giving Justin this weird look, Justin looks at me for a second then looks away and moves to the other side of the couch.

"Justin? Is something wrong?" I say worried

"Um, nah, I just don't want to be so close to you it's weird… Wait that came out wrong, I mean, um, well…"

I get up and leave straight for the door, why are both guys acting so weird today, cant we just act like friends without one of them getting angry or upset. I sit at the edge of the stage and behind me Justin appears and taps my head and sits next to me.

"Hollie, you know I didn't mean it that way, I love you, and it's just a little awkward with Jaden at the moment"

"Why? I don't get it? Can't we just all act normal or should I go back to Stratford am I becoming a distraction?" I say

"A distraction to Jaden" Justin mummers under his breath but I pretend I don't hear it

"No baby, come-on, I need to finish sound check, get ready for tonight, where something hot" he says as he winks

The concerts over and Justin rocked it tonight, I mean, the total package. We sit back stage after the concert with the whole crew. Justin saying his thanks before we go and getting the run down for tomorrow. Justin comes over and asks me if I liked the concert

"It was amazing! One of the best ive seen, jeez you where amazing!"

Justin leans over and kisses me on the check, scooter pops out of nowhere and takes a photo

"This is going on twitter biebs" scooter yells as the camera goes off

"Hey let me see that! Wow hollie you look stunning" he says as he winks at me

"Justin, stop flirting with your best friend its weird"

"Is this flirting for ya," he gives me a huge hugs and lifts me off the ground

"Justin stop messing around, you'll drop me!" I say as I'm in hysterics

"Oh you two, let's go back to the hotel watch a movie or something?"

We arrive at the hotel, and as always its five stars, after getting changed into pjs me and Justin go back to our room.

"Image how many girls are jealous of us right now, staying the same room?"

"It's a connecting room, I'm physically not in your room" I say with a laugh.

"What movie do you wanna watch? never say never?" he says sarcastically

"Actually yes please"

He doesn't hesitate, we get all curled up on the couch, but then Jaden walks in the room and sits right next to me and put his arm around me. I look at Justin and he just gives me a look like just go with it. About ten minutes in, I doze off, right on Justin's shoulder but he doesn't care. It reminds me of old times hanging in Stratford as kids , messing around being total idiots, but we both didn't mind, because we are best friends and it is how it should be…


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two- Favourite Girl

Early morning wake up again, Justin sleeping in as always, I had to literally jump on his bed. But I got that cute little smile I love when he saw me. Scooter came in at around 7, to tell us about what's happening today

"So, uhh, Justin you have cd signings at the mall at 10"

"Aighhttt, hollie get ready for more screaming fans!" Justin said with a laugh whilst look at me and pocking his tongue out.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you, Kenny said that hollie can't come too much of a security risk, ya know, but she can hang with Jaden today," scooter said with a frown

Justin looked at me with a frown and gives me a huge hug and whispered in my ear "you can have me tonight, shawty" winked and walks down to breakfast.

Jaden sits down next to me at the huge round table at the buffet, leaned over and kissed me on the check before I could tell him off; he was already up picking his food. Justin looked straight at me with this funny look, and rolled his eyes and got up to pick his food too. Jaden appeared from around the corner, as usual

"So what you want to do baby, today?" he said with a sleazy accent

I stared at him, and shock my head and replied "uh, I don't care, catch a movie or something, and hang by the pool?"

He nodded and Pattie appeared to sit by the table, she gave me a hug and we started talking about the world tour, asking if everything was fine and if I need anything. But I didn't need anything, Justin brought me everything, new clothes expensive shoes, I didn't ask for these things he just got them for me. I always ask him why he does, but he replies your special to me, you deserve to be spoiled.

"Come on team gatta go, say your goodbyes to Jaden and hollie," scooter yells to the table

Everyone starts pilling on the bus but off course Justin's the last on.

"Bye baby, see you tonight, I'm just a text away, and have a fun time with Jaden…" he says with a frown

"Bye Justin, miss ya" but before I can kiss him on the check Jaden pulls my arm and drags me into the elevator. I look behind me and see Justin giving me another weird look, rolling his eyes again and walking away.

Spending the day with Jaden wasn't that bad; he hanged by the pool and just talked as friends. He was really sweet and all we could do was laugh all day, because I'm 16 and has 15, we can talk about everything. Our relationship isn't like me and Justin's, but I just loving having Jaden there.

"So, you and Justin, aye, anything romantic going on their" he says with a completely straight face

I answer with a laugh "come on, Jaden, I couldn't, he's like my brother, I love him but I couldn't go out with him, it would be creepy,"

Jaden and I start laughing hysterically; he puts him hand on my knee, and moves closer to me.

"Speaking of the devil…" Jaden says and Justin starts walking towards us, as soon I see him I move away from Jaden and pick his hand of my leg.

I give a huge wave to Justin, but instead of walking towards me, he takes a sharp turn towards the elevator and up to his room. I look at Jaden and he shrouds his shoulder.

I get up to the pent house floor, and open the door to our room, Justin's sitting on the balcony.

"Hey what was that all about?" I say with a loud tone

Justin doesn't even give any expression

"Justin? What's wrong with you today?"

"Why don't you ask your boyfriend… or something, you rather spend time with him and joke around about me, huhh?"

I sigh, and pick the chair next to him, and grab his two hands with mine "are you being serious, boyfriend? I can't even think of that, why are you being so protective anyways?"

"It's just, I don't want you falling for a boy that doesn't appreciate you like I see you, you're my favourite girl Hollie, and I don't want you to get hurt by Jaden, I no he wouldn't, but it's just…" he fades off

"Oh baby, I love you and I would tell you if I liked Jaden, which I don't, and you know it, I'm here to support you not to get all caught up in a relationship"

I can hardly finish my sentence, Justin, kisses my check softly stares into my eyes and says "what would I do without you,"

I hear a slight chuckle behind me, and turn to see scooter "well sorry to break the romantic mood, time for dinner love birds, make sure you hold hands to show you love off the whole crew" he says cheekily.

"Oh stop it!" and say as I push scooter aside

But the thing was we did hold hands down to dinner, not because we were told, because it felt right…


	3. Chapter 3

_**A Justin Bieber Love story**_

I woke up to Justin hitting with a pillow and his bare arms hugging me hard and the whisper in your ear "hey shawty, time to get up", best feeling in the world. I and Justin take the elevator down to breakfast, he takes one look at what I'm wearing and winks "little short Hollie," he replies with a cheeky smile.

We get down to breakfast, and I see Jaden from across the room, he runs over and gives me a massive hug, I push him away remembering the night before, I glance at Justin, but he does that crooked smile I love. I suddenly see Justin run towards the door, I turn to see what the fuss is about, but it's just Chaz Justin Biebers best friend. I walk over to introduce myself but the thing is he's already walking towards me.

"Wow, Justin, lucky having this gurl on your tour aye," Chaz utters

I go bright red, actually realising he's hot, "I would _**like**_ you, on tour any day," I reply with a cheeky smile, not even caring about Justin's surprised expression

We both laugh, and walk over to scooter whilst he's telling the plans for the day

"So, Justin you're free for the day, but the crew and parents have to set for tonight's concert,"

Justin yelled at the tops of his lungs "yeaaaaa babby," kinda shocked me, but if you knew Justin, he doesn't this a lot.

"Anyways, so chaz, wanna catch a movie or something?" I say in a flirty voice.

But then realising Justin's standing right next to him, and I turn it into a joke, but Justin knowing me, knew it wasn't.

We decided on just watching a movie in me and Justin's room, chaz thought it was so weird how we shared a room together, but me and Justin just looked at each other and winked. The two boys, wanted to watch a scary moving, and being out ruled we had to. I sat underneath the covers of my bed and Justin joined me.

"Uh? Guys?" he said finding it strange how we were underneath the covers of my double bed.

"Oh, come here hot stuff and sit next to me"

Half way into the movie, chaz moved closer to me and put his hand over my shoulder, I rested on his shoulder. Justin coughs on purpose but I don't care that much, I really like Chaz and I don't want Justin getting the way. Justin mouths words to chaz, and I don't even want to know what they were talking about, obviously me. Justin moved a little away from me, then gets up and leaves the room.

"Why would you," chaz mummers in my ear

"What, what do you mean?"

"You've known Justin your whole life, hollie, as if you don't know…" he walked out of the hotel room, looking back and raising his eyebrows

I have so much on my mind; I walk out to the balcony, and look out to the Malibu beach in front of my eyes, and see Justin sitting at the edge of the jetty.

I get to the end of the jetty; Justin's sitting facing the water

"Justin, what's happened to us?" I say with tears in my eyes

"Uh nothing baby" tears roll down his eyes, and I sit down and wipe them off his checks

"Justin, I don't get it, you've been acting all protective, I'm your best friend just tell me!" I say raising my voice

"Tell you, why don't I show you," his wet checks hit mine instantly, whilst his lips touched mine. My only instinct was to push him away, and slap him across the face. I didn't mean it, ive known him for so long; I was just so surprised I couldn't react in any other way.

His red eyes stared at me with pain washing through them, I kissed him on the fore head, got up, walked down the jetty. I couldn't handle it, but all I could hear was the faint whisper from behind me,

"You're who I'm thinking of…"

I run up to my room, rushing into the elevator, hoping it stops on any floors, because I'm balling my eyes out. Then the door opens on level 3, a Jaden walks in. I grap his jacket and pull him into me, I wrap my arms around him and sob into his shoulder. He doesn't say one word all the way up to the pent house floor, and when I leave the elevator, he doesn't follow. I turn back to see him blowing me a kiss and closing the elevator door.

When I go to pull the handle to my door, Justin stands there with his arms spread wide open, all I can do is run into them, he has the best hugs.

"I'm so sorry I didn't mean it, I don't know what came over me" Justin says in a worried voice

"It's okay, I love you, it's all that matters," I pull away to see his face, I stare into his brown glowing eyes.

"I have to go get ready, for tonight, baby," he says with a crooked smile

"I should to," but instead of a hug, I give him a peck on the lips, then head of the shower, I look behind me, and I get that wink, which drives me crazy.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

I wake up the hug of Justin and his cold lips touching the side of my check

"Good morning gorgeous, time for breakfast," Justin whispers in my ear.

I go have a quick shower and get into my summer dress, curl my hair and put on makeup, I step out of the bathroom and Justin takes a look at me

"Well aren't I the luckiest man in the world, you look amazing as usual" he says whilst giving me a cheeky grin

"Well you're so hot your burning my eyes" I say whilst touching his nose and kissing his lips

We get in the elevator down to breakfast, holding hands as normal, staring into each other's eyes. We walk into the private dining hall, last to arrive as normal. We walk in laughing and having our arms round each other. We sit down not really noticing the whole crew, not to forget Justin's mums staring at us.

"uh-mmm" Pattie clears her thought on purpose

Me and Justin let each other's hands go from underneath the table and stop staring in each other's eyes.

"So what's going on here," Pattie says whilst pointing at us

"Well, where, kinda going out mum," Justin says whilst giving me a soft kiss on the check

Pattie gives me a smile and a nod "finally!" she says, we all burst out into laughter

When the whole crew has finished breakfast scooter stands up and tells us the plans for the day,

"The crew need to pack up the stage that we _**didn't**_ use last night, because Hollie and Justin were on their romantic prom date, and they are now going out!" the whole crew stare at Justin and I, scooter was in hysterics behind me. I just look at Justin and gasp; he touches my lips and smiles.

"Anyways, Justin and Hollie, you can just hang out together all day till 3 then we are getting on the tour bus, next stop Stratford"

I can't wait till Stratford; I get to see my family, friends and spend time with Justin doing the things we loved doing growing up. See chaz again, hopefully not making it awkward. Justin touches my shoulder and whispers in my ear,

"Walk on the beach?"

I nod and we get up and leave from the table. The day is perfect amazing; Justin takes my hand and moves me closer into him

"Are we official?" Justin says in a shy voice.

Giving Justin a cheeky smile, and kissing his lips firmly, he winks and gets the memo. But behind my back I see a flash; I turn round to see what it is, and a bunch of paparazzi taking photos of me and Justin. I stare at Justin, but he just laughs and kisses me on purpose to show off we are going out. By the time I know it there are hundreds and so many fans look at us. It gets overwhelming and I signal to Justin telling him we should go back to our rooms. We hold hands and walk back to the hotel, but behind my back I hear a belieber scream

"You don't deserve him, your look like a horse, Justin needs better!" she yells at the top of her lungs Justin knows I hear because he holds my hand tighter and rubs my back. After being shocked about what the girl said, I head up to the hotel room and grab my laptop. I swing it onto the bed and cuddle up next to Justin on his bed. Being curious after what the girl said earlier at the beach, I type my name into Google, not expecting it to come up, but there is over 136,000,000 results. I click on the first link, and I read the bold capital letter **NEEDS TO GET PRETTY, **I click onto the second link **JUSTIN CAN DO BETTER,** click onto the third link getting quite upset **HOW CAN JUSTIN EVEN KISS YOUR FACE**, water starts to gather in my eyes and all I can do is cry. Justin notices and put his arms around my shoulders,

"Shawty, what's up? Do you…" he can't even finish his sentence without slamming the computer screen down.

"Why would you even look at that stuff, it's all fake and wrong?" Justin says whilst playing with my hair, being so shocked I can't barley talk. I looked out the window but Justin moved my head towards his.

"You" _**he kissed me**_ "are" _**kiss**_"beautiful" and ended it with a kiss. I couldn't resist but smile, I hear the door open and scooter.

"Is it physically possible for you to be any closer," Scooter says with a laugh, whilst jumping in between us.

"Change of plans for today, we are heading to Stratford early morning, traffic is really bad, ya know" I frown, I was so excited to go to Stratford, Justin sees my disappointment and leans across scooter to give me a kiss,

"I'll be going NOW!" scooter says whilst getting up, and patting me on leg and giving me a slight wink.

I and Justin decide to catch a movie, at the local cinema. But I think that was a bad idea. We get to the local cinema and see thousands of fans already lined up to see us. Kenny gets us through the back door, and we sit in the seats at the back. Justin puts his hand around the back of my chair and his other hand on my knee. It was good because there was hardly anyone in the cinema, and it just felt like me and Justin. Half way into the movie though, the girl in front of us screamed at the top of her lungs

"Look at the ugly girl with Justin!" everyone stares at us too,

Another girl followed with "jeez Justin you could do better," Justin seeing my reaction, squeezed my hand

By the third girl screaming "EW how you could kiss that," I was up out of my seat, and I raced to the girls bathroom. Justin ran after me

"Hollie, they being ridiculous," he says in his sweet voice,

I start crying, I couldn't help it "I don't deserve you," I say whilst closing the girls bathroom door, Justin realising it was the girls bathroom he waited outside calling my name. I was in the bathroom crying for over half an hour, Justin being inpatient went in, took my hand and lead me out side.

He took one look at me, and rubbed off the dripping eye liner with his soft fingers. "You don't deserve this" his mumbles to himself as he takes me back into the cinema.

"listen up" he yells at the top of his lungs "this is hollie, she's my girlfriend, I love her, and any of you have a problem with that, don't call yourself beliebers or fans, because she's part of my life and always will"

I star at Justin, he stares back at me

"I love you Justin" I say quietly to him, as a kiss his nose, he pursues his lips and I kiss those too. He holds my hand and walks me out of the cinema; we both stare at each other and don't lose that gaze all the way back the hotel…


	5. Chapter 5

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

I wake up the hug of Justin and his cold lips touching the side of my check

"Good morning gorgeous, time for breakfast," Justin whispers in my ear.

I go have a quick shower and get into my summer dress, curl my hair and put on makeup, I step out of the bathroom and Justin takes a look at me

"Well aren't I the luckiest man in the world, you look amazing as usual" he says whilst giving me a cheeky grin

"Well you're so hot your burning my eyes" I say whilst touching his nose and kissing his lips

We get in the elevator down to breakfast, holding hands as normal, staring into each other's eyes. We walk into the private dining hall, last to arrive as normal. We walk in laughing and having our arms round each other. We sit down not really noticing the whole crew, not to forget Justin's mums staring at us.

"uh-mmm" Pattie clears her thought on purpose

Me and Justin let each other's hands go from underneath the table and stop staring in each other's eyes.

"So what's going on here," Pattie says whilst pointing at us

"Well, where, kinda going out mum," Justin says whilst giving me a soft kiss on the check

Pattie gives me a smile and a nod "finally!" she says, we all burst out into laughter

When the whole crew has finished breakfast scooter stands up and tells us the plans for the day,

"The crew need to pack up the stage that we _**didn't**_ use last night, because Hollie and Justin were on their romantic prom date, and they are now going out!" the whole crew stare at Justin and I, scooter was in hysterics behind me. I just look at Justin and gasp; he touches my lips and smiles.

"Anyways, Justin and Hollie, you can just hang out together all day till 3 then we are getting on the tour bus, next stop Stratford"

I can't wait till Stratford; I get to see my family, friends and spend time with Justin doing the things we loved doing growing up. See chaz again, hopefully not making it awkward. Justin touches my shoulder and whispers in my ear,

"Walk on the beach?"

I nod and we get up and leave from the table. The day is perfect amazing; Justin takes my hand and moves me closer into him

"Are we official?" Justin says in a shy voice.

Giving Justin a cheeky smile, and kissing his lips firmly, he winks and gets the memo. But behind my back I see a flash; I turn round to see what it is, and a bunch of paparazzi taking photos of me and Justin. I stare at Justin, but he just laughs and kisses me on purpose to show off we are going out. By the time I know it there are hundreds and so many fans look at us. It gets overwhelming and I signal to Justin telling him we should go back to our rooms. We hold hands and walk back to the hotel, but behind my back I hear a belieber scream

"You don't deserve him, your look like a horse, Justin needs better!" she yells at the top of her lungs Justin knows I hear because he holds my hand tighter and rubs my back. After being shocked about what the girl said, I head up to the hotel room and grab my laptop. I swing it onto the bed and cuddle up next to Justin on his bed. Being curious after what the girl said earlier at the beach, I type my name into Google, not expecting it to come up, but there is over 136,000,000 results. I click on the first link, and I read the bold capital letter **NEEDS TO GET PRETTY, **I click onto the second link **JUSTIN CAN DO BETTER,** click onto the third link getting quite upset **HOW CAN JUSTIN EVEN KISS YOUR FACE**, water starts to gather in my eyes and all I can do is cry. Justin notices and put his arms around my shoulders,

"Shawty, what's up? Do you…" he can't even finish his sentence without slamming the computer screen down.

"Why would you even look at that stuff, it's all fake and wrong?" Justin says whilst playing with my hair, being so shocked I can't barley talk. I looked out the window but Justin moved my head towards his.

"You" _**he kissed me**_ "are" _**kiss**_"beautiful" and ended it with a kiss. I couldn't resist but smile, I hear the door open and scooter.

"Is it physically possible for you to be any closer," Scooter says with a laugh, whilst jumping in between us.

"Change of plans for today, we are heading to Stratford early morning, traffic is really bad, ya know" I frown, I was so excited to go to Stratford, Justin sees my disappointment and leans across scooter to give me a kiss,

"I'll be going NOW!" scooter says whilst getting up, and patting me on leg and giving me a slight wink.

I and Justin decide to catch a movie, at the local cinema. But I think that was a bad idea. We get to the local cinema and see thousands of fans already lined up to see us. Kenny gets us through the back door, and we sit in the seats at the back. Justin puts his hand around the back of my chair and his other hand on my knee. It was good because there was hardly anyone in the cinema, and it just felt like me and Justin. Half way into the movie though, the girl in front of us screamed at the top of her lungs

"Look at the ugly girl with Justin!" everyone stares at us too,

Another girl followed with "jeez Justin you could do better," Justin seeing my reaction, squeezed my hand

By the third girl screaming "EW how you could kiss that," I was up out of my seat, and I raced to the girls bathroom. Justin ran after me

"Hollie, they being ridiculous," he says in his sweet voice,

I start crying, I couldn't help it "I don't deserve you," I say whilst closing the girls bathroom door, Justin realising it was the girls bathroom he waited outside calling my name. I was in the bathroom crying for over half an hour, Justin being inpatient went in, took my hand and lead me out side.

He took one look at me, and rubbed off the dripping eye liner with his soft fingers. "You don't deserve this" his mumbles to himself as he takes me back into the cinema.

"listen up" he yells at the top of his lungs "this is hollie, she's my girlfriend, I love her, and any of you have a problem with that, don't call yourself beliebers or fans, because she's part of my life and always will"

I star at Justin, he stares back at me

"I love you Justin" I say quietly to him, as a kiss his nose, he pursues his lips and I kiss those too. He holds my hand and walks me out of the cinema; we both stare at each other and don't lose that gaze all the way back the hotel…


	6. Chapter 6

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

I wake up to lying on a bare chest next to me, and I nearly have a heart attack. I get up with a jolt but then realising its just, Justin. I didn't know at first why I was in Justin's bed but then I realised I must have fallen asleep whilst we were talking last night.

"Uhh," Justin says whilst waking up and smiling at me, "sorry, I got hot" whilst look at his chest

"I bet you where" I say whilst winking at him and giving him my cheeky smile

"Come here hollie," he pulls me closer and gives me a kiss and a seductive smile.

The whole crew gets onto the bus at around noon to go to Stratford, which is around a two hour bus ride. I pack my bags and head down stairs, Justin's waiting for me in the elevator. He helps me with my bags as I put them onto the bus,

"I'm going to miss Malibu, we have so many memories" I frown whilst looking at Justin

Justin flicks his hair and puts his hand around my shoulder, "oh gorgeous" he replies as giving me a kiss on the nose. We head onto the bus and I take a seat next to Jaden and Scooter. About an hour into the trip, I fall asleep on Justin's shoulder as he plays with my hair and hums to me quietly,

"You're a lucky man," Jaden says to Justin, when he thinks I'm asleep

"The luckiest" he replies and kiss me on the head, I smile and fall into a deep sleep.

I wake up when the bus stops and I hear the engine slow down. Justin strokes me on the head and whispers "wake up darling,"

I head of the bus, and smell the warm Canadian air; this is when I know I'm home. I see in the distance, three girls run towards the bus, being with Justin I think its more fans. But as they come closer I see my best friends Moni, Annie and Issy, I was so shocked I screamed at the top of my lungs. I ran towards them and give them the biggest hugs and we all jumped around like lunatics.

"Oh my god guys, I missed you so much" I said whilst hugging them and jumping around

"Babes, I thought you would never come home," Moni replies

I see Justin walk towards us, them not knowing I was going out with him, I planting a hug kiss on him and they all screamed like little girls.

"And you didn't text me the news, why?" Annie says whilst in shock

"I wanted it to be a surprise," I say whilst laughing

Justin signals the sign that I have to grap my bags and see my family. I say my goodbyes and head to get my bags, the thing was I wasn't excited to go home, but Justin didn't know this.

He walks me over to the front door of my house, and holds my hand and stares at me. He presses the buzzer and says "you excited!" I turn to him and quickly reply "Justin I was meaning to tell you, I…" I can't even finish my sentence; my Dad opens the door with a vodka bottle in one hand and the television remote in the other. I squeeze Justin's hand so hard, he lets out a grunt.

"Beautiful, yous home" he slurs, I can barely understand him he's so drunk. I walk inside to see my mum, but I couldn't find her anywhere. I drop my bags, grap Justin's hand and run up stairs. I open all the doors on the first floor; I get to the master bed room. I see her lying in bed asleep; I burst into tears not knowing how to control myself. I grap my mum's hands and kneel next to the bed.

"Mum ma, are you okay" I say whilst the tears are rolling down my face uncontrollably. She sits up, I look at her face and see all her hair gone, not one single strand in sight. You can see the bruising underneath her eyes from the chemo.

"Darling your home, don't cry, it's all fine" she replies, her voice is so weak, I can barely hear her. Justin comes behind me and pats my back trying to make me feel better, but nothing can stop me from crying.

"Justin nice to see you around here, haven't seen you in around four years" Justin's face drops, realising why I never invited him over. "I'm sorry" he whispers whilst looking down at his feet.

I stay by her side for half an hour, not saying one word, just holding her hands in mine. When she drifts off the sleep, Justin takes me hand and leads me out of the room. I can't help it, I fall into his arms and sob onto his jacket.

"Why didn't you tell me," Justin whispers in my ear whilst stroking my head

"I thought she would get better, but the cancer has spread to her brain, she has no hope of…" I can't finish my sentence, I just cry into Justin's shoulder, pain spreading through my body.

Justin takes my hand and walks me down the stairs, out the door and to the local shop. "You need to eat," he insists, I have no energy to argue. I can barely eat when my food comes, I just look down at my feet and Justin holds my hand the whole time he eats. Half way into having my second bite, I get a call from my Mums doctor, which I thought was very odd.

"You need to come into the hospital, Ms Stewart, Your Mum has had an accident" I sob into the phone. I tell Justin, and he leads me to the car, not taking his eyes off me while we walk to the car door.

It takes around half an hour to get to the hospital, I ran through the corridors till I get to the room my Mums. I see her hooked up to all these machines; I can't believe my eyes,

"Oh Ms Hollie Stewart, I see you arrived, your mother, whilst she was sleeping experienced a minor heart attack," He says whilst sitting me down on the chairs in the corner "Her chances of living are limited, I would like you to say your last goodbyes, although she's unconscious, the chances of her hearing you are still there." Tears run down my face I couldn't control them. The doctor walks out of the room, closes the door and nodes at me and Justin.

"Hollie, I, uh, um…" Justin didn't know what to say, he takes he's finger and brushes the tears off my face.

"You don't need to say anything, I just want you to be here, and you'll be all I have" I see tears run down Justin's face as well as he kisses me on the lips.

I walk over and pull the chair next to my mum's bed; I take her cold hands and place them on top of mine,

"_Mum if you can hear me, I love you, I wish you fought this fight like you told me to fight all of mine, I wish you knew how much you meant to me, I wish you could be still there to tuck me in at night, I wish you knew how happy Justin made me feel, I wish you could see me on my wedding day, see my first baby, see me at graduation, but you won't. I hope you will watch down on me from heaven, I hope I do you proud, be the daughter you wanted me to be. I love you mum and I…"_ I hear the heart monitor go into one long beep, I know the fights over. I put my head into my knees and hug them with my hands. I scream, cry, and yell. I hear Justin sobbing behind me, and the doctors rushing in and out.

I sit in my own little word, crying out all my sorrows. I get up and run into Justin's arms,

"Never leave me," I whisper in his ear

"I promise" he replies faintly whilst kissing me on the forehead and pulling me closer…


	7. Chapter 7

I hadn't seen anyone after the death of my mum; I turned everyone away, even Justin. It was the fourth day, I hadn't seen anyone. I heard a knock at the door, and I knew dad was out so I mopped down stairs and opened the door. All I had to do was look at the purple supra's and know Justin came to see me. I look up at him and I stared into the beautiful face I call boyfriend.

"Is it too soon," Justin asks while he reaches for my hand. I couldn't resist I grab his hand too and pull him into a hug. I rest my head on his shoulder and kiss his neck.

"I missed you" I whisper into his ear, he smiled and replied "I missed you too"

I invited him inside and we sat on the couch, I rested my head on his stomach as he played with my hair. I noticed the date on his watch as I put my hand in his; I noticed it was the day of my mum's funeral. Justin saw that I noticed, and took his hand out of mine

"It's okay, I know" I tell Justin whilst looking up at him,

"Let's get ready then, gorgeous," Justin replies in the sweetest voice possible

I walk up stairs into my room, Justin following close behind me. I pick out my black maxi skirt and black mid drift singlet. I walk into the bathroom to get changed; Justin waited and sat down on my bed. I slipped on my clothes and put my makeup on. I was shaking, but I didn't really know why, and I could barley put my hair up.

"Justin, could you help me for a second" I yell through the bathroom door, he opens the door and sees my hands shaking as I try and put my hair up. He puts his hands on mine and kisses them softly.

"I'll do it" he says whilst taking the elastic and putting my hair in a pony tail. When he's done, I look down at my feet and let the tears roll down my face. Justin picks up my face and kiss's my lips softly,

"Please don't cry, when you smile I smile" he says whilst staring into my eyes and whipping the tears off with his fingers. I hear scooter call us from down stairs that we have to go, I take Justin's hang and make my way towards the door. He lets go and throws his guitar over his shoulder and grabs my hand again.

"What do you need that for," I say curiously

"You'll see" as he walks down the stairs and looks back at me.

It takes around and hour to get to the cemetery my mother will be buried in. I get there and see around fifty people waiting around her coffin, crying and placing their flowers. I see Moni, Chaz and Jaden walk towards me. They say sorry and give me a hug, but all I want is Justin right now. I grab his hand and we walk up to my mother's coffin. I see the beautiful photo of her placed at the top with flowers surrounding it, all I can see is water gathers up in my eyes. Justin squeezes my hand as he sees me cry and rubs my back.

I take my seat as the ceremony starts to begin; I put my hand on Justin's leg as he puts his hand on mine. It starts with her past life, how she loved everyone and everything. Past friends say their speeches and places flowers on her coffin. My Dad gets up for the first time not drunk and says his speech, this is the first time ive seen him cry and I can't help it but start crying too. When it's my turn to get up and say my speech and place my flowers on her coffin, I freeze up and can't stop crying. Justin looks over at me and rubs my knee

"I know what she wants to say" Justin says, whilst he grips his guitar and stands up. He pulls a chair out and sits down and rests his guitar on his knee. "This is for you Ms Stewart, and for her daughter Hollie, who I love," Justin starts strumming the guitar, whilst giving me a wink and his crooked smile. He opens his mouth and sings

"_**Ohh Ohh Ohh .. and I pray**__**  
><strong>__**I just cant sleep tonight.**__**  
><strong>__**Knowing that things aint right.**__**  
><strong>__**Its in the papers, its on the tv, its everywhere that I go.**__**  
><strong>__**Children are crying.**__**  
><strong>__**Soldiers are dying**__**  
><strong>__**Some people don't have a home**__**  
><strong>__**But I know there's sunshine behind that rain**__**  
><strong>__**I know there's good times behind that pain, hey**__**  
><strong>__**Can you tell me how I can make a change**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and I can see a better day**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and pray**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and I can see a better day**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and pray**__****_

_**I lose my appetite, knowing kids starve tonight.**__**  
><strong>__**And when I sit up, cause my dinner is still on my plate.**__**  
><strong>__**Ooo I got a vision, to make a difference.**__**  
><strong>__**And its starting today.**__****_

_**Cause I know there's sunshine behind that rain**__**  
><strong>__**I know there's good times behind that pain, hey**__****_

_**Haven`t tell me how I can make a change**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and I can see a better day**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and pray**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and I can see a better day**__****_

_**I close my eyes and pray**__**  
><strong>__**For the broken-hearted.**__**  
><strong>__**I pray for the life not started**__**  
><strong>__**I pray for all the ones not breathing.**__**  
><strong>__**I pray for all the souls in need.**__**  
><strong>__**I pray. Can you give em one today.**__**  
><strong>__**I just cant sleep tonight**__**  
><strong>__**Can someone tell how to make a change?**__****_

_**I close my eyes and I can see a better day**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and pray**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and I can see a better day**__**  
><strong>__**I close my eyes and I pray**__****_

_**I pray ..**__****_

_**I close my eyes and pray .."**_

When he finishes I can't help it but run up to him and kiss him passionately on the lips. I look into his eyes and mouth thank you, I place my flowers on her grave as I see the coffin get lowered into the ground. Tears move down my face.

People start to leave as the ceremony ends, but I'm still standing there crying, staring at my mother's grave. Justin comes up to me and hugs me from the back, "time to go shawty," he whispers in my ear as he takes me hand and leads me to the car.

"Hollie," He says whilst we sit down and buckle up, "Tomorrow, I have to go back on tour and uh… with your mum in all… do you still want to come on tour with me?" Justin says curiously not trying to hurt my feelings.

"all I want to do is be with you right now," I tell Justin while I kiss his check and play with his hands.

"all I want is you forever," Justin says whilst turning my face and placing his soft lips on mine…


	8. Chapter 8

I get all my bags packed before seven, that's when the bus is leaving for Philadelphia for Justin's concert, such an early wake up. At ten past seven I race down stairs and open the door thinking's its Justin, but it's just Issy. I give her a big hug, but a little disappointed it's not Justin. She looks at me with a weird face, like the one she used to give me when she really wanted something.

"Hollie, could I, uh" "go on tour with you" she says the last bit like a rocket. I look at her with raised eyebrows and then we both burst out in laughter.

"and you want to because?" I ask curiously "you pinkie promise" she says like where in sixth grade, I nod "I really like Jaden" she giggles.

"you what!" I say whilst I break out in complete laughter "shhhhh" she hisses at me "don't you dare tell Justin" she insists whilst grabbing me by the shoulders.

"oh I already know" I hear a husky voice from behind Issy, Justin of course. I grab his arm, pull him towards me and kiss him.

"good morning to you too" Justin says in a cheeky voice whilst winking, "and yeah of course you can come, but just don't kiss Jaden in front of me" Justin says whilst smiling at Issy

"yes, thankyou, thankyou, you have got one good boyfriend hollie" she says whilst giving me a hug and running back to her house to pack her bags.

"I sure _**do**_ have a good boyfriend" I say whilst looking at Justin and kissing his nose

Before I step onto the tour bus, I take a look around and say to myself "I'm going to miss you Stratford"

"I'm going to miss it too" Justin says whilst hugging me from behind and whispering it in my ear.

"I'm going to miss you Hollie" I hear a sob behind my back and see Moni in complete tears. I give her a huge hug and start crying too

"I'll be back before you know it I swear" I say to her to cheer her up

"and me?" Annie says whilst joining in on the hug

"I'll miss you all," I say whilst stepping onto the bus and blowing them kisses.

I sit next to Jaden and Justin for the trip, Its going to be around 5 hours so I get comfortable on Justin's shoulder and put my ear phones in. I see Issy sitting next to Jaden, and see them chatting so I take my earphones out to see what they are talking about, but it's just music.

I hear Never say Never on the radio, Justin and Jaden tells them to turn it up and when the raps comes on Jaden jumps up and starts rapping

"_**ere we go!**__**  
><strong>__**Guess who?**__**  
><strong>__**JSmith and Jb!**__**  
><strong>__**I gotcha lil bro.**__**  
><strong>__**I can handle him.**__**  
><strong>__**Hold up, aight?**__**  
><strong>__**I can handle him.**__**  
><strong>__**Now he's bigger than me,**__**  
><strong>__**Taller than me.**__**  
><strong>__**And he's older than me,**__**  
><strong>__**And stronger than me.**__**  
><strong>__**And his arms a little bit longer than me.**__**  
><strong>__**But he ain't on a JB song with me!**__**  
><strong>__**I be trying a chill**__**  
><strong>__**They be trying to side with the thrill.**__**  
><strong>__**No pun intended, was raised by the power of Will.**__**  
><strong>__**Like Luke with the force, when push comes to shove.**__**  
><strong>__**Like Cobe with the 4th, ice water with blood.**__**  
><strong>__**I gotta be the best, and yes**__**  
><strong>__**We're the flyest.**__**  
><strong>__**Like David and Goliath,**__**  
><strong>__**I conquered the giant.**__**  
><strong>__**So now I got the world in my hand,**__**  
><strong>__**I was born from two stars**__**  
><strong>__**So the moon's where I land."**__**  
><strong>_

The whole tour bus was clapping along and laughing, when he finished sin it to my self

"_**I will never say never! (I will fight)**__**  
><strong>__**I will fight till forever! (make it right)**__**  
><strong>__**Whenever you knock me down,**__**  
><strong>__**I will not stay on the ground."**_

But when I stop, I see the whole crew staring at me, with their mouths wide open. In embarrassment I cover my head and hold Justin's hand

"I'm sorry I'm that bad!" I giggle as I say to the crew, all of them just keep staring back at me, until Justin yells

"Hollie, your AMAZING!" the whole crew starts clapping, I think they are all joking so I walk off to the back of the tour bus laughing.

I sit on the couches at the back of the bus, and put my earphones in trying not to remember the embarrassing moment, which just happened before. But of course I look up and I see Justin walking towards me. He slides along the couch and take my earphones out, he leans in, stares into my eyes and starts making out with me. I gasp for breath,

"I can hardly breath," I say seductively whilst winking at him, he looks at me and gives me his crooked smile.

"I have something to give you, Close your eyes" he says whilst reaching into his pocket. I close my eyes eager to know what it is.

"Here Shawty" I open my eyes and see a jewellery box in front of my eyes, I give him a quick peck and open the box.

I open the box and see a silver necklaces, I look closer and see engraved

**Be mine forever  
>Justin<strong>

It was the best gift I had ever been given, I look at Justin, I can't even believe he would ever get me anything like this. I look into his eyes and kiss his fore head,

"I love you Justin," I whisper quietly, whilst kissing him on the lips again and again. I clip the necklaces on around my neck, I can't stop smiling.

"I didn't get you anything," I said with a frown, whilst holding his hands in mine

"you give me everything just being my girlfriend," he says this so innocently, but its means the world to me. I grab his face and a give him a long kiss, after I'm done he looks up at me, licks his lips and mouths _**I love you…**_


	9. Chapter 9

I open my eyes and see Justin playing with my hair, must have been sleeping on his lap again. We were still on the road, and it didn't look like we were going to be stopping anytime soon. Justin saw I was awake and gives me a huge smile. I sit up, half asleep and look around to see where Issy and Jaden are, couldn't see them anywhere.

"Gorgeous did I wake you?" Justin asks

"No" I say whilst kissing his lips, I take another look around and don't see Issy anywhere. "Justin, where's issy?" I say curiously

"Oh, don't know, go look at the back of the bus maybe" he replies.

I get up and walk to the end of the bus, opening the door to the bedroom, but she's not their either. I call her name but she's doesn't answer. I open a cupboard; well I thought it was a cupboard. I see Issy and Jaden making out in the bathroom and I gasp with surprise. They both turn and stare at me and blush and push each other away. I close the door and run back to Justin and bury my head in his lap.

"That was horrible," I say in a panic "they were making out," Justin lifts my head and touches my chin

"Do you want to show them how it's done," he says seductively whilst leaning in, I couldn't resist.

It takes around three more hours to get to Philly, and as the engine stops I run off the tour bus to get fresh air. But I didn't realise it was the middle of autumn and how could it was. Justin came out and put his jacket around me and kissed me on the cheek.

I walk into the arena where Justin will play tonight, and I have to say it was huge. It was all set up, pictures of Justin everywhere. I look around and notice how big the stage was and how I would love to be up there with him.

"You're so lucky," I scream to Justin who's at the back of the arena, he notices and gives me a wink. He runs done the middle of the arena and jumps onto the stage, and jumps into my arms. "And that was for" I say giggling as he spins me around.

"Because I'm so lucky, lucky to have you" he whispers in my ear, and kisses my nose.

Before, I know it; it's an hour before the concert. I walk off to Justin's dressing room where my clothes are for the night. I open the door and see Justin doing his warm ups into the mirror. I walk over and start mocking him from behind, he sees me in the mirror and turns around and tickles me on the stomach.

"I have to do these," he says with a smile, whilst placing me down on his lap.

"I need to get changed Justin" I say whilst getting up and giving him a cheeky smile. He pursues his lips at me, wanting a kiss. I walk over and lean into to kiss him, but turn away just before I touch his lips. He lets out a grunt and rolls his eyes, I turn around and give him a cheeky smile, wink and walk off to get changed.

I walk out in my low back leotard, my high waisted maroon skirt and black high tops. Justin turns and sees me,

"Why are you so stunning?" he says whilst getting up and holding my hand, I blush as we walk out to talk to the crew.

The normal before concert run throughs go on, Justin getting his mike, running around getting pumped, huddling in a circle and cheering him on. Right before he's about to go on, he takes my hand and holds me in a deep hug.

"I'll be thinking of you tonight," he whispers in my ear

"Good luck, I wish I was your one less lonely girl" I say with a giggle and kiss his neck. He looks up and stares into my eyes, and gives me a wink. Before he takes the stage he holds my head and gives me a long kiss.

I wait backstage, and just listen to my iPod and tell the crew to come get me when the one less lonely girl is picked, it's my favourite bit. I see Justin race back and forth backstage to get changed, he always gives me his crooked smile as he comes past. When he has his five minute break he comes and sits next to me. I look at him; he's all red and tiered.

"One less lonely girl picked next," he winks at me, "come stand by the stage entrance so you can see shawty" he says whilst taking my hand and pulling me up. He walks me to the entrance and tells me to wait here; I can see perfect view of the stage. "My time to shine" he says as he kisses me on the cheek and runs on stage. I wait eagerly for him to pick a girl out of the crowd,

"Today's going to be kind of different beliebers and my one less lonely girl is…" he runs back to me, grabs my hand and takes me onto the stage, "Hollie!" My mouth drops when I see the crowd in front of me cheering. I shake my head at him as he sits me down, but all he does is keep singing. I have to say he is amazing, his voice was magical. He sings whilst playing with my hair and touching my face, I sit in complete shock. After his finished he gives me a soft kiss and a cheeky crooked smile. The crowd goes wild.

"Before hollie goes back, I have one more thing she has to do," He hands me a microphone, and behind me the instrumental of _**overboard**_ comes on. I know what he's thinking and I shake my head and mouth "no" he walks over to me and takes me by the shoulders and whispers in my ear

"I love you, you can do this, I believe in you" but he forgot he had his microphone in and the whole stadium hears. They all smiled and started cheering me on. I couldn't resist, I sing along with Justin, he gives me a smile, mouthing I'm doing perfect. When the song is over, the whole stadium starts screaming and chanting. All I can do is smile and hug Justin and whisper "thankyou" into his ear. I walk off stage, I'm incomplete shock.

After Justin's last song, he runs off and grabs my hand and twirls me around.

"You where amazing," he screams, whilst kissing me over and over again. I try and say thank you, but his lips where in the way, and I wasn't arguing. The whole crew comes over and starts giving me hugs and saying I was amazing as well, it was all a little too much.

"You out showed me" Jaden says in a sarcastic tone

"You out showed _**me**_" I hear from Justin

We walk back to the dressing room, hand in hand, so Justin can get changed. As we walk back together he asks, "Will you do a duet with me?" I start laughing thinking he's joking, but then I see his straight face,

"I would do anything for you," I reply whilst turning around and our lips meet…


	10. Chapter 10

I had the best sleep last night, no interruptions. I woke up to a bright light shining in my eyes, then realised it was Justin opening the blinds. He comes over and jumps on top of me and gives me a huge hug. He cuddles under the covers with me and I stare deep into his eyes. "I've got a signing in an hour, bubs," he says as he tempts me with his lips. I frown because I hate when Justin has signings, so he kisses my lips... I can't help but smile.

I head to the shower to get ready, as I look over my shoulder I see Justin give me an alluring wink. I put on my new high-waisted shorts with my ripped I love Justin Bieber top. (Justin gave it to me as a joke.) I walk out; Justin takes one look at me and bursts out in laughter. He grabs me by the hips and pulls me into him,

"Why are you so sexy?" he says as he kisses me on the lips and brushes the hair out of my eyes. We walk downstairs where I see all the Beliebers waiting for him. They are so loud and out of control, it's crazy. As he notices me gasp Justin takes my hand in his.

Justin takes his spot at the desk where he will be signing and meeting the fans. I wait beside Kenny, staying out of Justin's way. He sees me pulls up a chair and calls me over. One by one, every fan comes; they get a hug, signature and a picture. Most of them are crying their hearts out.

I really needed to go to the bathroom, so I tell Justin. I come back a few minutes later to see a sight so shocking that I skipped a breath. I couldn't believe my eyes; Justin was kissing another girl. Justin pulls away from her and sees me from across the room, and pushes the girl away. I turned away and ran from the room, tears streaming down my cheeks. There I sat, in front of the cracked bathroom mirror staring at my reflection. I close my eyes, I can hear Justin by the door calling my name but I don't reply.

I hear Justin outside calling my name; he knows he can't come in, but he does anyway. He takes me by the hands but I brush them off.

"She kissed me Hollie! You must know that right? You do believe me?" he says as he takes my face in his hands and gazes into my eyes. I turn away and look in the mirror, seeing my expression of sadness makes me feel cold all over,

"She was pretty Justin, I know you" I snap at him, I turn my back on him. He rolls his eyes and grunts.

"Well you obviously don't Hollie!" he replies irritably, "I'm sick and tired of all your drama, you're so protective!" He walks out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

I run out of the bathroom, and up the back stairs to my bedroom so the Beliebers can't see me. On my way up, I see issy walking down; I grab her by the shoulders and give her a hug. She pats my back when she notices that I'm crying.

"What's wrong?" she says sweetly, in a curious tone. "Justin." I blurt out between; She completely understands and walks me up to my room.

I sit on my bed and bury my head into the pillow to cry

"I have to go talk to him," Issy says angrily. She runs out the door and slams it behind her, not leaving enough time for me to say 'don't'. She was gone for about an hour... I tried texting her, calling her, even facebooking her! ...but she didn't answer. I got worried. I knew she was only just down the hall, but I didn't want to knock on Justin's door. I hang out in my room waiting for her to knock at the door... but there was no sound of footsteps in the corridor, no closing of doors, not one knock on the door... no sign of Issy.

I decide that I have to go to Justin's room and find her. I leave the room and make my way to his door. I tap on the door there was no answer. I stand there awkwardly waiting for a while, but then, I remember the key he had given me to use the day before. I pulled it out from my pocket and turned it in the lock. I silently walk in, thinking that he may be asleep. He wasn't asleep; but he was using the bed...

I couldn't believe my eyes, how could she betray me. Issy looks at me white in the face and in shock; she knows that I've seen. Justin turns and drops his head in disgrace.

I slam the door, and run down the corridor and Issy is right behind me.

"Hollie wait," she yells as she follows me, I'm in tears and I can't believe that she would do that. "It was nothing" she screams as she takes me by the shoulders

"So, making out with my boyfriend on his bed, is nothing?" she stops, and drops her hands. She tries to give me a hug, but I pull her away. "And I thought you were my friend," I say in the nastiest voice, whilst rolling my eyes.

"And you thought he was your boyfriend," she says offensively. I slap her across the face, and walk off. I couldn't hold in the tears, when I got back to my room.

I didn't know how to get out my frustration so I call Moni; it was all I could do. I hear her voice on the other line, and I just cry.

"I want to come back home," I cry into the phone, she tries to cheer me up as I tell her what happened. She can't believe it, and starts crying with me.

When she has to go, I'm just left in my room alone. I hear a knock at the door, thinking its Justin, I just sit and cry. I notice he keeps knocking, and doesn't open the door. It odd because it thought he had a key and would open it. I get up and look through the key whole and see Jaden standing there, tears rolling down his face.

I open the door, and fall into his arms. I grab his arm and we sit down on my bed. I look at his sad face, and I can't believe Issy would do this to us.

I rest my head on his shoulder as I play with his hands. He takes my face with his soft hands, and places it in front of his. I don't really remember what happened after that, just the feeling of his lips on mine…


	11. Chapter 11

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

Couldn't sleep last night, too much on my mind, Justin, Issy, Jaden and everything. I wake up to seeing my alarm clock, 9:30. Was supposed to be down at breakfast at 9, But Justin didn't wake me, I wasn't surprised. I didn't know if he knew about the kiss with Jaden yet, but I don't think I want him to. I don't know why I kissed Jaden, to make him jealous or to feel wanted.

As I walk down stairs, I cover my ears with my _**Just Beats**_to block out the surrounding world. I walk into the breakfast dining room, and see nothing but stares from everyone. I grab my food avoiding eye contact and take it outside. I find a chair facing the hotel pool which was pretty deserted. I try and take a bite, but I feel a tapping on my shoulder.**Jaden**.

"Hey, Beautiful" he says whilst leaning in, and trying to kiss my lips. I pull him away instantly. He looks at me with surprise and avoids looking at me. He sits next to me and starts playing with my hands.

"Jaden, about…" I try and finish put Jaden's fingers are on my lips, "I get it, one off, you where angry, I was too," he says whilst staring at me and winking, "Our secret" he says whilst kissing me on the cheek and laughing. I feel someone behind me and turn to look. **Justin. **

"Yeah, you hypocrite," he says with a snarl and walks off. I get up, grab his hand and I turn around.

"You can't talk," I yell in his face, he rolls his eyes and basically doesn't listen. I can't even bare to look at him at the moment. I take my plates and walk inside to the where breakfast is being eaten. I take a seat next to Pattie, as far away from Issy as possible. Pattie raises her eyebrows as I sit down, I think she knows about me and Justin.

I can't really eat, so I take my phone out and start texting Moni. Pattie looks over and takes my phone. I look up and stare at her in shock,

"You need to talk to Issy," she says whilst throwing my phone back on my lap, and leaving the table. I look at Issy from across the room. She staring straight back at me. I wave her outside, and she nods.

"Why did you do it," she stares back at me, no expression what so ever. We just stand there for five minutes, not answer, just looking down.

"Biggest mistake of my life," she replies whilst sobbing. I couldn't see her cry; I take her shoulders and pull her into a hug. We cry, staining each other's shirts with mascara.

"It will take time, to forgive, Issy" I say whilst pushing her away. She nods as I walk back up to the hotel room.

I lie on my bed, and look up to the ceiling. I try thinking about forgiving Issy, but it's too hard to think about. She betrayed me but I betrayed her too. I hear someone open the door, and I rub off the mascara dripping from my eyes. I see Justin lean against the door way and give me a crooked smile. I look away, I can barley look at him it makes me feel sick. He walks towards me and sits at the end of my bed and drops his head into his hands.

"I don't know why I did it," he muffles into his hands. I don't want to answer; I don't really want to talk to him.

"It's a good thing I came in when I did, or you know, it would have leaded too…" he turns around and shakes his head and tries to figure out what to say.

"I'm Christian Hollie and if I were to, my eyes are on one girl…" he fades off towards the end, inferring to me. He scoots up the bed and takes my hands in his. He looks at me with his big eyes, I can see his eyelashes wet from crying.

"I can't look at you right now," I utter whilst turning my head. He takes me chin and moves it around to face his. All I can think about is his soft lips, how he used to kiss me and tell me I was beautiful. I jump back from the bed whilst shaking my head.

"I can't get pulled back in, Justin" I yell at him whilst tears roll down my cheeks. He mouths to me _stop crying,_ but I can't. He gets up and takes me by the hips, how I used to like it. I look down at my feet avoiding his eyes.

"I'm bigger, Hollie. I've learnt I won't ever…" I cut him off and place my fingers on his lips. My lips meet his cheek and his eyes meet mine.

I take one look and I'm already straight back in love with him…


	12. Chapter 12

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

"Time to wake up," Justin whispers in my ear, no kiss, no hug just a whisper. He walks out of the room, closing the door behind him. I got no good morning kiss, he didn't get under the blankets and he didn't say good morning beautiful, I miss it all. I throw on an old sweater and a pair of uggs and order room service. I scream to Justin in the room next door asking if he wants anything. He appears out of the door way, wet hair and a towel. I try not to drop my jar but it was pretty hard. I stand there with messy bed hair, whilst all I can see is his six packs. He gives me a crooked smile and asks for eggs,

"May, room 209, penthouse suite please have two boiled eggs, two orange juices and uh…" I can't speak properly, I'm very distracted. Justin takes the phone and finishes the order for me. He looks down at his bare chest where I'm staring and laughs noticing why I'm distracted. He walks over and takes my chin

"I think bed hair is sexy too," he whispers in my ear whilst walking off to get changed.

When the food arrives we both sit on the table, just us too. We look awkwardly at each other, trying to make conversation. I just sit there drinking my orange juice,

"Hollie?" he says quietly, I look up to his cheeky smile staring back at me. I nod.

"Do you want to go on vacation?" I smile to the idea, but remember everything that has happened these last few days and frown.

"Uh Justin, isn't it a little early with you, me, Issy and Jaden" I ask curiously

"That's the whole reason to go on vacation, shawty" I smile when I hear shawty, been a long time since I've heard him call me that. We talk about going on vacation whilst we eat breakfast thinking about where to go and who to bring. We decide on Fiji and bringing Issy and Jaden. I notice that we don't have an adult and we decide on Scooter, although he's classified as an adult, he doesn't act it.

We go to tell the others. We walk along the corridor to Issy's room; I miss the way Justin would hold my hand everywhere we walk. I knock on the door and she opens it with a rush surprised to see me and Justin,

"are you two back together," she smiles as she points to us, I look at Justin awkwardly he winks and walks in without answering Issy's question. We tell her about the plans and she is so excited, she loves the idea. I hear a knocking at the door I look through the peep hole and see Jaden. I give him a hug and lead him to where Issy and Justin are.

"We are going on vacation!" Issy screams whilst running over to Jaden and hugging him. They both stare at each other; remember what happened a few days before, Jaden whispers in Issy's ear "I still love you" as he kisses her lips.

I take Justin's hand and walk out of the hotel room, Justin yells behind him "good on ya," to Jaden with a chuckle.

We make our way to Scooters room hoping he says yes to the whole idea. We knock at the door, waiting for him to answer. I look at Justin as he signs into twitter.

"What are you saying?" I ask as he starts to write a tweet, "Take a look yourself," he replies whilst showing me his phone, I smile when I see

_**hollieStewart I will neverletyougo, #swag**_

He takes me by the hips and pulls me into him; he runs his fingers through my hair whilst softly placing his lips on mine.

"hu-mm" I hear as the door opens and as Isee Scooter standing there. Justin looks at me and laughs as he takes my hand and takes me inside. We tell him the idea, and he's a little surprised at first but agrees.

We all sit down and look up flights, hoping there are some in the next few weeks. As we are looking through I spot some, but they are for tomorrow. I look at Justin and he realises these are the only ones in the next month. We look at each other and nod,

"I guess we are going to Fiji tomorrow," he yells whilst taking my face and kissing my lips…


	13. Chapter 13

Thirteen

It took a lot of convincing for Pattie to let us go away today, Justin practically had to beg. I didn't blame her though, we are going out and it is quiet far away. I got my bags packed quickly because we are only going for a week I didn't need that much. While I was packing I realised I didn't pack any bikinis back in Stratford. I call to Justin the room next door and tell him, but he insists he buys me one over there whilst seductively winking. I know where he was going with it.

The drive to the airport is around an hour but it felt longer, I just wanted to get there. Justin sits next to me in the car whilst placing his arm around my shoulders and stroking the side of my face. Pattie has come along for the ride to the airport keeping a close eye on me a Justin. When we get to the airport, the normal security happens; back way, separate check in and straight onto the plane. First class as always. We say our goodbyes to Pattie and walk onto the plane.

I take a seat at the back, next to Justin and rest my head on his shoulder. When the plane starts to lift of the ground I start to feel sick. Justin takes my hand knowing that I'm getting scared. It wasn't working; I could feel my stomach dropping. He grabs my chin and starts making out with me, when the plane is all the way up in the air he pulls away,

"Did I distract you?" he says whilst giving me the crooked smile I love. I respond with kissing hips again and hoping onto his lap. Justin runs his fingers through my hair and places his hands on my back.

"Let's keep this G rated huh?" Scooter says whilst staring at us. I hop off Justin's lap and whip my lips clean. Scooter nods and turns back around; I look at Justin and give out a giggle.

When the plane arrives in Fiji, I can't help but have a massive grin on my face. Justin takes my hand as we walk off the plane and into the private car. I fall asleep on Justin's shoulder straight away on the way to the hotel,

"Wake up sweetie," Justin says whilst arriving at the hotel. We don't have to do anything when we get there. People take our bags, check us in, get our room keys and take us up to our room.

As soon as Justin put the key in the door my mouth drops, it was amazing. Penthouse suite, we all get out own bathrooms, bedrooms and balcony. In all the excitement I grab Justin and give him a huge hug

"Thank you, thank you, thank you" I say in his ear whilst kissing him on the cheek.

"You deserve it" he replies whilst whispering in my ear.

I open the door to the balcony and look at the view, it's amazing. I feel Justin's hands on my back as he stands next to me.

"I love you Justin, this is going to be a holiday I never…" I can't finish, Justin kisses me unexpectedly "What was that for?" I ask whilst kissing him back.

"To a new beginning" He replies whilst pulling me into him.

I have a shower, put on my floral maxi skirt, white cropped singlet, gladiators, and crimp my hair and put on my makeup. I walk out to Justin standing their taking photos of me. I grab the camera whilst giggling.

"You know I don't like photos? Why do you want them anyways?" I ask

"You're beautiful and I want to remember this trip in every possible way." I can't help but smile.

We walk down to lunch, haven't eaten since this morning and I'm starving. As I'm in the elevator Justin whispers in my ear "I have a surprise for you" I giggle wondering what it will be. I take my seat at the table and feel a faint tap on my shoulder. I turn to see who it is and see Chaz, I'm so surprised I get up and throw my arms around him. I look at Justin and he gives me a wink.

"I can't believe you're here?" I say to him in surprise

"Only for one night, but I'm glad to be here with you!" he replies.

We all sit down and have lunch together, laughing and giggling. I go to get my phone out of my pocket but realise I left it up in the room. I get up to leave the table and go back to my room to get it,

"I'll come with you" Chaz says whilst getting up and taking my hand, Justin gives me a strange look but nods.

We both step into the elevator and I see Chaz giving me a weird look, but I brush it off. He takes me by the hips like Justin does, but this time I don't like it. His grip is firm, pushing me against the side of the elevator and I try pushing him off but I can't.

"Chaz?" I say in a worried voice. He places his lips on mine forcing them. His hands move lower down my back and his lips become more firm. I try kicking him off, but nothing I do can stop him.

"Chaz!" I scream at the top of my voice,

"I've missed you Baby" he says whilst trying to kiss my check, he just won't stop. The elevator door opens and I kick him hard in the shin. He pulls away grabbing his leg and letting out a grunt. Tears roll down my face as I rush to my hotel room. I put the key in with shaky hands and close it straight behind me. I lock it. I lean against the back of the door and drop to the ground. I hug my knees whilst wiping of the saliva from my lips.

I hear chaz from the other side of the door, calling out my name. I close my eyes and let my head drop into my knees.

All I want is Justin right now, but I don't know if I really do…


	14. Chapter 14

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

Once I knew Chaz left and went back down to breakfast I didn't know what else to do. I didn't take the elevator, I took the stairs. I saw chaz and Justin talking at the table as I walked in, laughing, I didn't know how he could.

"What took you so long beautiful" Justin says whilst trying to kiss my cheek. I push him off and tell him not to. He gives me a strange look and sits back down. I look at chaz, but he doesn't seem to notice. Justin comes and sits next to me, and puts his hand on my knee. I get flash backs from the elevator and move away from him. He puts his hands in his laps and looks at me confused.

"I thought we would go shopping later, you needed a bikini right?" Justin says whilst winking at me, but I give no emotion. I nod and sip my drink. Justin puts his lips to my ear and whispers "Is everything all right?" I nod again. He knows something is up, he knows me to well. I see him talking to chaz, and I feel sick in my stomach. My food arrives and I can hardly eat it. The whole table notices, so I'm forced to eat.

Under the table, I feel Justin's supra's on my legs. I turn to him and he mouths 'are you alright'. The thing is I didn't want to tell Justin, I was embarrassed, he wouldn't believe me he would think I cheated on him. I nod back to him but he knows I'm not ok.

When it's time to go shopping, I regret it so much. Justin takes my hand as we leave the hotel. Chaz right behind us. I feel anxious when Justin holds my hand, all I can remember is what happened earlier. We walk down back streets, avoiding paparazzi. We get to a surf shop and go in the back way, being with Justin and all, they close the whole shop down just for us.

I look through swimmers, seeing so many I like. I pick out a black cupped frill bikini top and high waisted gipsy bottoms. I walk off to the change room, in my peripheral I see Chaz eyeing me off. I slam the change room door behind me locking it straight away. I get changed, and I'm so happy with how they look. I call Justin over and open the door so he can see. His mouth drops as he looks me up and down.

He takes me by the hips I let out a scream and kick him off. I get all the flash backs from the elevator, all the unwanted kisses, all the unwanted everything. He falls to the floor and grabs his shin,

"Jeezz Hollie, What the hell is wrong with you!" He yells back at me, I run out of the shop still half naked.

I run down a side alley, and lean against the wall and fall to the floor. My eyes are drenched and I can't help but yelp. I look behind me and see Chaz standing, his shadow reflecting onto me. He moves closer and grabs my wrist.

"Get off me!" I scream, but he doesn't hear me, no one can. He looks me up and down, realising I'm Just in a bikini. He feels me up, I try to kick, scratch and bite but nothing seems to help. I can feel his bare hands on my back and his seductive smile.

As he looks me up and down realising I'm not wearing much he whispers to himself "Half way there". I scream for help but all that comes out is a pathetic squeal. I look down at my feet, closing my eyes waiting for the worst. Then I feel the grip of Chaz, weaken and completely go. I look up to see him lying on the floor and a boy standing there, fist red.

I look up into his face, tanned, blue eyed, my height and blonde hair staring back at me. Before I can say thank you he interrupts

"It's good I got here in time, you shouldn't be wondering round in your bikini, in an alley?" he says whilst giving me his jacket to put over his shoulders,

"You practically saved my life, I'm Hollie and your" He moves closer and rubs off the dripping mascara from my eyes. He opens my hand and slips in a piece of paper. He puts his lips to my ears and whispers "River" he kisses my cheek and walks off, down the alley. I read the piece of scrunched paper in my hand, and read a mobile number, obviously his.

In the distance I see Justin running towards me, screaming my name. He sees chaz unconscious on the ground, and my eyes running with tears. He takes me in his arms and I place my head on his shoulder. I tell him everything, and he stops me half way through when I say the words "Against my will" he just takes me by the chin and passionately kisses me on the lips.

He parts from my lips and whispers "too soon," I just grab him by the hair and pull him towards me. I open my eyes. I see River peering around the corner; he winks then turns and disappears.

As I kiss Justin I think about how lucky I am, not to have Justin, to have _**River**_…


	15. Chapter 15

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

Once I knew Chaz left and went back down to breakfast I didn't know what else to do. I didn't take the elevator, I took the stairs. I saw chaz and Justin talking at the table as I walked in, laughing, I didn't know how he could.

"What took you so long beautiful" Justin says whilst trying to kiss my cheek. I push him off and tell him not to. He gives me a strange look and sits back down. I look at chaz, but he doesn't seem to notice. Justin comes and sits next to me, and puts his hand on my knee. I get flash backs from the elevator and move away from him. He puts his hands in his laps and looks at me confused.

"I thought we would go shopping later, you needed a bikini right?" Justin says whilst winking at me, but I give no emotion. I nod and sip my drink. Justin puts his lips to my ear and whispers "Is everything all right?" I nod again. He knows something is up, he knows me to well. I see him talking to chaz, and I feel sick in my stomach. My food arrives and I can hardly eat it. The whole table notices, so I'm forced to eat.

Under the table, I feel Justin's supra's on my legs. I turn to him and he mouths 'are you alright'. The thing is I didn't want to tell Justin, I was embarrassed, he wouldn't believe me he would think I cheated on him. I nod back to him but he knows I'm not ok.

When it's time to go shopping, I regret it so much. Justin takes my hand as we leave the hotel. Chaz right behind us. I feel anxious when Justin holds my hand, all I can remember is what happened earlier. We walk down back streets, avoiding paparazzi. We get to a surf shop and go in the back way, being with Justin and all, they close the whole shop down just for us.

I look through swimmers, seeing so many I like. I pick out a black cupped frill bikini top and high waisted gipsy bottoms. I walk off to the change room, in my peripheral I see Chaz eyeing me off. I slam the change room door behind me locking it straight away. I get changed, and I'm so happy with how they look. I call Justin over and open the door so he can see. His mouth drops as he looks me up and down.

He takes me by the hips I let out a scream and kick him off. I get all the flash backs from the elevator, all the unwanted kisses, all the unwanted everything. He falls to the floor and grabs his shin,

"Jeezz Hollie, What the hell is wrong with you!" He yells back at me, I run out of the shop still half naked.

I run down a side alley, and lean against the wall and fall to the floor. My eyes are drenched and I can't help but yelp. I look behind me and see Chaz standing, his shadow reflecting onto me. He moves closer and grabs my wrist.

"Get off me!" I scream, but he doesn't hear me, no one can. He looks me up and down, realising I'm Just in a bikini. He feels me up, I try to kick, scratch and bite but nothing seems to help. I can feel his bare hands on my back and his seductive smile.

As he looks me up and down realising I'm not wearing much he whispers to himself "Half way there". I scream for help but all that comes out is a pathetic squeal. I look down at my feet, closing my eyes waiting for the worst. Then I feel the grip of Chaz, weaken and completely go. I look up to see him lying on the floor and a boy standing there, fist red.

I look up into his face, tanned, blue eyed, my height and blonde hair staring back at me. Before I can say thank you he interrupts

"It's good I got here in time, you shouldn't be wondering round in your bikini, in an alley?" he says whilst giving me his jacket to put over his shoulders,

"You practically saved my life, I'm Hollie and your" He moves closer and rubs off the dripping mascara from my eyes. He opens my hand and slips in a piece of paper. He puts his lips to my ears and whispers "River" he kisses my cheek and walks off, down the alley. I read the piece of scrunched paper in my hand, and read a mobile number, obviously his.

In the distance I see Justin running towards me, screaming my name. He sees chaz unconscious on the ground, and my eyes running with tears. He takes me in his arms and I place my head on his shoulder. I tell him everything, and he stops me half way through when I say the words "Against my will" he just takes me by the chin and passionately kisses me on the lips.

He parts from my lips and whispers "too soon," I just grab him by the hair and pull him towards me. I open my eyes. I see River peering around the corner; he winks then turns and disappears.

As I kiss Justin I think about how lucky I am, not to have Justin, to have _**River**_…


	16. Chapter 16

Justin's pulls my seat out as I sit down next to River. I look over at River, but he's already looking at me. Those deep blue eyes where amazing. Justin rests his hand on my knee, marking his territory I think. I place my napkin on my lap and turned my phone to vibrate, no distractions. I didn't know how to start conversation; all I was getting were stares from Justin and River.

"So, River you like it here in Fiji?" I look to River but all I got was giggle, I didn't know if it was what I said or what. I look at him confused,

"Really? I'm Australian mate" My whole face went red when I realised he wasn't Fijian and I noticed how strong his Australian accent was. I looked over at Justin and he was giving me a crooked smile I loved, that always made me feel better.

"River, what do you do?" Justin asks trying to make the mood less awkward. River looked at Justin strangely like his question was bizarre.

"I'm 17?" He says in a fierce tone. I sit back in my chair and I feel Justin slip his fingers into mine. Justin rolls his eyes and coughs.

"Oh sorry, I forgot your _Justin Bieber_" River replies rudely and sarcastically. I look down at my feet, I can feel the tension.

"Let's order shall we!" I say to break up the mood and call over the waiter. Justin orders for me as normal, he's good with what I like. I see River in the corner of my eye he orders for himself and giggles whilst doing it. I raise my eye brow at Justin but he just winks back at me.

"You can't order for yourself love?" River says whilst mocking me, I can't bare it he's being suck a pig.

I get up from the table, telling Justin and River I just need to go to the bathroom. But Justin knows I just want to get away from River.

"Can you do this by yourself this time?" I hear River call from behind me, I don't listen I just keep walking.

I take my phone out of my purse and walk out of the restaurant. I sit on a bench nearby and dial Issy's number into it.

"Hollie! Aren't you with River and Justin?" She asks curiously

"Rivers being so rude and I had to take a break from it" I reply whilst looking around, seeing if Justin has followed me.

"Just get back at him, act really flirty with Justin" I think about it and I can't resist. I say my goodbyes and walk back into the restaurant.

I see Justin, acting sexy as ever. The thing is I'm not just going to act flirty around Justin because Issy told me, I actually just want to. I walk over and place my hands on his chin I turn his face around and kiss his soft lips. He looks at me with his eyes and I see him wanting more. I bite my lips tempting him I know he's going crazy. He takes the back of my neck and pushes it forward so I'm kissing him again. His hands move lower down my back, I'm basically sitting on top of him. I completely forget we are in a restaurant, until I hear the cough from River behind me. I turn to see him rolling his eyes at me and he stands up from his seat. He throughs his napkin on the table and starts to walk out, all I hear from behind me is

"I don't have time for his, Please Justin, for God's sake, the hair, cut it." I gasp when he insults Justin, I look at him but I don't think he cares. He is just looking, looking at me like I'm the most important person in his life.

Justin takes my hand as we leave the restaurant and walk to the stairs. I sigh when I see the six flights of stairs and Justin lets out a chuckle. He turns around and bends down in front of me; I have no idea what he is doing,

"Piggy back?" he asks me in a baby voice "How old are we Justin?" I say whilst shaking my head, but he knows I can't resist. I jump onto his back and he runs up the stairs, I'm surprised he can take me the whole way. When we get to the hotel door he opens it and closes it behind him. Instead of dropping me off he turns me around so I'm at the front of him. He pushes me against the door and he kisses my neck, I let out a giggle but he stops it with his lips. We start making out right there in the kitchen of the hotel, I'm just hoping issy, and Jaden or Scooter doesn't walk in. Justin sits me up on the bench and lays me back. He lies down on top of me and continues kissing me. He puts his hands on my hips and nudges my top up.

"Oh my god!" I hear Scooter yell from behind me, in shock I sit up banging heads with Justin on the way up. "Ouch!" I say whilst rubbing my head. I turn to see Scooter standing in his boxers and dressing gown whilst giving me and Justin dirty looks. I turn to see Justin laughing and winking at me.

"We eat here, can you at least take it somewhere else" Scooter says whilst picking me up and taking me off the bench. He pulls my top down and flattens down my hair and from the corner of my eye I see Issy and Jaden walk in the room.

"So what went on here," Jaden asks me whilst giving me a hug,

"They were practically undressing on the kitchen bench!" Scooter tells Jaden whilst laughing at us. Jaden looks surprised and raises his eyebrow. I see Issy behind him giving me the thumbs up and dancing around like a total idiot. Jaden turns to see Issy dancing and grabs her by the hips and kisses her lips. They both say goodnight to us and walk off to their bedrooms.

"Say your goodnights to Hollie and we need to talk Buddy" Scooter says to Justin. "And let's keep it G rated shall we?" Justin gives me a hug and kisses me softly on the lips.

"Good night beautiful" he says whilst walking off to scooters room. I look behind me and see Justin mouthing "help me!" whilst pointing to Scooter.

I walk off to my bedroom and lay under the covers, I drift off to sleep still being able to feel Justin's lips on mine…


	17. Chapter 17

I wake up to kisses on my neck and soft lips laid upon mine. Justin's hair rests on my shoulder as he plays with my hands. I kiss his forehead and snuggle down next to him. He lifts my shirt and starts drawing love hearts around my belly button, I giggle as it tickles. He moves down the bed and lies on top of me, resting his head on my chest. He looks up at me and smiles,

"Good morning Shawty," he says whilst moving up my body and planting his lips on mine. I push him away when I hear my phone go off; he reaches over to the side table for me and hands me my phone. Text from Issy, she's so lazy she can't be bothered to get up and tell me herself. _**Seen the new music video? **_I see the text and don't understand at first until I see Justin pass me the computer.

"Huh?" I ask him, really confused "Next 2 you is out, baby" I gasp when I realise it was released today. I log onto my computer quickly, so excited to see. He cuddles down next to me and we both watch the video together. He noticeably moves closer to me towards the last thirty seconds and I get why when the video ends. I open my mouth when I see the kiss, but he closes it with his fingers and places his face on mine,

"Trust me, she's was a hopeless kisser," I can't help but smile he goes into kiss me I stop him and say "Do you want me to show you what a good ones like?" He giggles as his lips touch mine. He puts his hands on my hips and passionately kisses me. Our tops ride up, so we are chest to chest, felt so right. I roll over so I'm on top of him, and run my hands through his hair. I hear I faint chuckle as I run my fingers down his chest, he's so ticklish.

"Can you at least lock the door if you practically going to _do it_?" I drop my head on Justin's neck when I hear scooter chuckle from behind us. I sit up and pull down my pyjamas and look at Scooter

"You could knock?" I ask him whilst Justin sits up next to me,

"But that would ruin the fun wouldn't it!" Scooter replies as he comes and jumps onto my bed. He raises his eyebrows at Justin and mouths "Remember what I told you!" I don't really take much notice. I yell for Issy and Jaden to come join us. They both come in holding hands and staring at each other. They both come and sit down next to us on my bed and start kissing.

"Please, no more kissing!" Scooter says whilst sitting in between them. I look over at Justin but he's just tweeting away. I take his phone and start writing a tweet for him, he would normally never allow me but he lets this one go. I press send and Justin immediately smiles when he sees it,

_No more tweeting for me today, all attention is on my girlfriend holliestewart _

"What are we doing today?" I ask curiously

"We are going to this club I like tonight, but nothing till then" as soon as he says free till night, I grab Issy's hand and scream "Shopping!" both boys grunt but me and Issy are already up and getting ready.

As we walk down the main street of Fiji, looking at all the shops I get a text from Justin

**Wear something hot tonight**

I smile when I see it and carry on shopping. It's good to have some quality time with Issy after all I've practically been spending all my time with Justin. I look around at all the shops but I don't really see anything I like. We keep walking and at the corner of my eye I see a vintage dress store, Issy hesitates but she knows how much I love the stuff. I walk in and I see everything I love, I don't know what to pick out first. I pick out a tight black dress with a velvet blazer I look through shoes and find leopard print wedge high heels. I try on the whole outfit and I just have to buy it. I walk out to show Issy and all she does is gasps when she sees me.

"Oh wow, image what Justin is going to think?" When I hear what she says I smile and go back to get changed. I buy for the outfit and we start walking back to the hotel. Issy stops me on the way back and she sits me down by a bench to talk to me.

"You and Justin are serious right?" I nod thinking where she is going with this "Have you…"

I realising what she is talking about and reply "He's Christian, not until marriage, why?" She doesn't answer she looks down at her feet,

"Well have you?" She looks up at me and nods, I look at her surprised and I don't know what to say. "I love him, Hollie," I move closer to her and give her a hug. She talks about it with me, and all I do is listen.

"I'm so happy for you!" I reply, she looks up at me "You're not disappointed?" she asks curiously, "You're my best friend Issy, I would never."

When it's around an hour till we have to leave I hop into the bathroom to get changed. I slip my black dress, blazer and tie up my shoes. I put some nude lipstick and black eyeliner on. I slightly curl my hair and messy it up a little, I walk out of the bathroom to find Justin sitting on the bed. He stands up when he sees me walk out and gives me a crooked smile. I walk over to him and he grabs me by the hips. He looks me up and down and gives me a hug, He goes in to kiss me but I back away,

"I'm wearing lipstick" I say with a giggle, but instead he kisses my check and forehead, I love when he does this. We walk out to see Issy and Jaden standing waiting for us. Jaden looks at me and whispers "wow" I see Issy notice and give him a friendly slap on the stomach.

We arrive at the club, and I can't believe how big it is. There are thousands of people their dancing, making out and drunk. We don't have to wait in line; we go in the back door. The lights on the dance floor where amazing and the atmosphere made the whole place come alive. I take Justin's hand and we move to the dance floor. We dance so close, kiss and stay together all night.

"Just going to get a drink, okay?" I nod and start dancing with Issy next to me. Justin was gone for around fifteen minutes I was getting worried. I look around and see him standing against the wall, I walk over to him

"Are you okay?" he doesn't answer so I ask him again,

"What, you are what?"He replies

I know something isn't right when his words are all slurred and his eyes are blood red. I smell his drink and all I smell is alcohol,

"You're drunk aren't you?" I say whilst placing my hands on his shoulders" He pushes me away, almost throwing me to the ground.

"Get away from me I don't know you" He says whilst nearly collapsing, I catch him and let him down to the ground, I look around for Jaden or Issy and see them across the dance floor,

"Stay here, going to get Jaden!" I jog to Jaden and grab his hand I take him over to where Justin was sitting.

He wasn't there. I look around and I see nothing. Jaden looks at me confused. I bend down to all that is left is his cup of alcohol. I pick it and look inside; I see a faint piece of paper. I reach in and can hardly read it but all I see are the faint words in cursive hand writing

_**Spiked…**_


	18. Chapter 18

When I knew he was kidnapped, all I felt was pain all over the body. I was in such panic I could hardly tell Jaden what was wrong. When I finally got the words out he pulled out his phone and called the police. He called over Issy and told her to go home with scooter back to the hotel she didn't argue she knew by my face something was wrong. Jaden took my hand, lead my outside and into the police car. Jaden held my head on his shoulder and kissed my forehead, he saw the ache in my heart. It wasn't a long ride to the police station, but when I got there I wish it was. I walked in, still holding Jaden's hand and got showed into a small dark room. Scooter was waiting for us when we walked in, I saw his face and I knew it wasn't good.

The police sat me down and made me answer pointless questions, which seemed to do nothing. When the pain in my body was gone all that came out were tears. I was balling my eyes and clutching my stomach, it hurt. Jaden pulled my out of the room and took me around the corner out of site. He pinned me against the wall and whispered in my ear,

"It's going to be alright…" I knew he was trying to make it sound believable but I knew in his voice he didn't believe it. I touched my lips and I saw the water gather in his eyes.

"You know what Hollie, you where the first girl I ever loved and Justin is yours." He moved closer to my face, "I don't like to see you like this, Justin's in love with you…" He ran his fingers along my lips whilst placing his forehead on mine, "The next time you see him my fingers won't be on your lips, his will be, his eyes will be looking into yours, his hands around your waist and his hands running through your hair. Hollie you just…" He didn't need to finish he knew what he had to say, I placed my head on his shoulder whilst staining his white shirt black. He wrapped his arms around me and sobbed.

I felt Scooters tap on my shoulder and I turned to see his bright red eyes. I gave him a hug when I noticed he had been crying and he couldn't help the tear run down his face,

"Back to the hotel…" He said as he placed his hand in mine and started to walk off. I pushed him away and looked at him is disbelief,

"There is nothing we can do tonight," he told me whilst walking to the door, I shook my head and he took me by the shoulders and forced me out the door,

"I love him scooter, how dare you!" I screamed, the whole street looked at me as I sank to the ground and tears ran down my face. "Come on sweet heart," I couldn't believe him giving up so we could try tomorrow, but would he be here tomorrow. The thought ran through my mind and I got up off the ground and ran down the street, I could hear Scooter screaming from behind me. I kept running till scooters screaming from behind me faded and I was all alone. I looked around and saw no one, big black apartments and black alley-ways. I felt a cold breath run down my spine and turned to see. I gasp but then only realised it was Jaden, he took my by the shoulders and shook me,

"Are you crazy?" I looked down at my feet as the tears kept on coming. I moved in to hug him but he went all limp and fell to the ground. I look down to see his face on the floor and no movement in his body. I lift his face, but there is no expression. I move to his mouth and hear a breath. I pull out of my pocket my phone but before I can unlock I see it get smashed into the wall next to me. I look up I see the blue eyes, blond hair, tanned Australian standing in front of me.

I stand up and stand in front of him, looking at him in disbelief that he just knocked out Jaden. I walk towards him looking for some love in his eyes, but all I see is the gun hanging out of his left pocket. I back away and slam against the brick wall. He walks towards me but I put my hands in front of me making a barrier between us. He reaches into his pocket and holds the gun to the corner of my face. He chuckles, is this a joke to him. I pant for air, I'm suffocating inside. He pulls my face to his and breaths down it. I see the anger in his eyes as he rubs his face down my chest.

"You deserve everything I will do to you!" He whispers into my ear as he pulls on my hair. I push him away but I can't I have no strength,

"What did I do?" I gasp as he pulls onto my body, "that Bieber guy, you don't need him!" He tries to kiss me but I punch his face, forcing him to the ground. I see him get up and reach for his pocket, the gun facing me.

I see a figure behind him knocking him to the ground. Justin. But he's too strong for him. I hear the bullet race past my face. It doesn't hit me.

"River!" I scream as Justin falls to the floor. The gushing blood from the wound is all over my hands and I can't help but feel dizzy. I scream but all that comes out is a faint breath. River runs off around the corner leaving me, my dyeing boyfriend.

Justin reaches for my hand as I see his pale face. I grab his hand and rest it on my lap. I try to stop the blood with my hands but nothing seems to work. His breath seems to weaken and so does mine. I move my face to his and place my hands around his cheeks.

"I love you, Hollie" he's trying to say his goodbyes but I stop it with my lips, I kiss him trying to bring hope to him.

"I wanted you to be my first time, my husband the father to my kids…" I can't get out anymore the tears overwhelm me and Justin stops me with kissing me back. Tears roll down his cheeks and all I can do is lie beside him and cry. I know it's all over, when I see his eyes slowly shutting and his breath nearly gone.

The siren goes off in the back for my mind, the siren of an ambulance. The thing was it wasn't in the back of my mind, it was there…


	19. Chapter 19

The white walls stained my eyes as I walked through the corridors. The pale faces looking back at me. The emergency room made me sick, and all I wanted to see was Justin. It was a long wait, longer than I thought. Jaden held my knee still, stopping it from shaking. When the doctors called us into his room, I didn't move. Jaden forced me up but I could barely stand up straight. I walked up to the door of his room, hearing the machines buzzing away inside. I look at the sign on the wall which says "critical condition". I rip the sign off in anger and drop it to the ground. Jaden takes me by the shoulders and backed me up against the wall, just like the police station. He took a piece of my hair and played with it around his finger. His soft hands on my neck where so cold it gave me a shiver,

"I'm hurting too…" He says as a tear rolls down his face. I look down at my feet, not wanting to gain eye contacting. It would be too much. Jaden softly plants his lips on my cheek and he slowly moves his hands down to mine. We walk over to Justin's room and he opens the door handle. I wish he didn't.

Alone, pale and crying. I saw the tears in his eyes and I could barely keep mine under control. Jaden rushed over to his side and grabbed his hand, but I couldn't move. I stood there observing him, his messed up hair, wound on his upper chest and his broken smile. He was watching me too though, his glance not even taking notice of Jaden. I walked over to him, slow, steady steps. I touched his cold face as he touched mine. I looked down at his body and saw the stiches and the wires near his heart. I heard his deep breaths as I touched his chest softly. I moved closer to his face wanting to touch those dry lips. He grabbed my neck before I could think; I felt the aggression as his lips moved on top of mine but then I felt the smooth kiss, the one I was used to. I could feel his pain as we interlocked and all I could do was kiss him back trying to give him a glance of hope. I could taste the medication when we started exchanging tongues, but I didn't mind, it felt like I was a part of him. I pulled away when I was out of breath and I saw the tears running down his face.

"I missed you," He said as he touched the edges of my face and gave me a soft peck on the lips. I didn't know what to say, I missed him more than words.

"I want to marry you" I couldn't believe what came out of my mouth as I whispered it in his ear. The thing is I didn't want to take it back. Justin looked back at me with a smile, the one that was my favourite. He ran his hands down my face and through my hair,

"You will one day," he says so softly I could barely hear him. A doctor comes in from behind me and taps me on the shoulder. She pushes me away and starts fiddling with his wires. I take a seat next to Jaden. Jaden looks at me with a weird look and nods his head. I mouth "what?" and his replies with a laugh,

"He will marry you now" I look at him with wide eyes noticing he heard. I put my fingers over his lips and say "shhh"

I just stare at Justin from across the room for around an hour as he gets his wound cleaning, medicine fed into him and wires changed. I can't help but be fascinated with how they take so much care with him, just like I would. When they leave they tell me I can only stay an hour longer with him. I bring my chair over to his bed and put my hand in his.

"Thank you," I'm confused when I hear the husky words come out of his mouth. He notices and then says

"If you went home with scooter I would of never be alive" I smile when I realise what he said was right and move closer to him. I kept thinking about what he always would talk about with scooter, what he would not tell me.

"Justin talking about scooter, what did he kept saying to you?" I say as I play with his lips on my fingers. He gives me a wink and runs his tongue over lips.

"You know how we are serious, like sexual… he was wondering if we had, you know" He sounded so awkward and I knew exactly what he was talking about.

"Honey, I know what you want to say," I reply so he doesn't find it any more awkward. He gives me a crooked smile and wraps his hands around me hair, he moves over on his bed signalling for me to lie next to him. I snuggle next to him, trying not to hurt him but he doesn't seem to mind. I look at his face and just see pure innocence,

"After marriage right?" He asks me as we were on the topic as he's hands rest on my stomach. I smile and kiss his lips, finishing it with a nod.

"Then you're not going to have to wait long…" I don't have time to fully filter what he just said; I'm interrupted with the kissing on my lips and his touch on me…


	20. Chapter 20

"Hollie, Justin, Jaden where about to go, where are you" I heard the voice of my body guard, Kenny in my ear telling me to get off the computer and back on my tour. Malibu was the next stop in the tour, and boy I was excited to get back to what I loved. This was my third concert in a row and I still had as much energy as the first. I sat at the back of the tour bus and saw Hollie being as dorky as always at the front,

"Hey, Hollie come here for a sec" I tried to say it in a husky voice the way Hollie said she liked it. She walks over and looks me straight in the eyes, that smile was too much for me to handle. "Sit down, I need to ask you something alright" I whispered as I got closer and closer to her face. I looked at her side profile and all I wanted to do was grab her face and kiss her. "I hate you" I answered whilst chuckling; "Justin you're such a boy!" she says whilst pushing me off her. I hear the footsteps come towards us and see Scooter appear he always has great timing "what you love birds up to this time?" Trust scooter to say this, just as I'm getting closer to Hollie. I go red in the face, but I don't think Hollie notices and reply "Good on ya Scooter" to try and brush it off. I looked over at Hollies face and she was starring right back at me, I gave her a sly wink and a small smile.

When I got the arena where I would be playing that night, it was crazy my beliebers never let me down. I saw the scared look on Hollies face so I reach out and grabbed her hand in mine, where it should always be. Hollie always tells me how people find it weird how we are so lovey dovey with each other, but hollie just passes it off because we are best friends. The thing is Hollie just is so naïve she doesn't realise I'm flirting with her. I looked over at Hollies other hand being occupied by Jaden.

I leave Hollies hand as she walks in to sit on some seats while I do a sound check. I run through my songs for the show tonight, baby, and one time all the songs I normal go through. But the thing is I couldn't get my eyes off Hollie and I could see her talking to Jaden which just made me even more distracted. I couldn't handle it anymore and I stepped off the front of the stage to see hollie, who was in the third row. I waved her back stage, so that we can talk.

"Hey Shawty, how you doing baby" I say whilst giving her a hug, god she smells amazing

"Oh dr Bieber, I sure got that fever" I know when she said this she was kidding, but I wish she wasn't. I wish she thought of me more than just a best friend.

I sit on the couch back stage and she joins me. I place my hand on her knee and start to talk about my concert tonight. I see Jaden walk in the room and give me a funny look, like move away from Hollie. I get all flustered and can't help but move to the other side of the couch.

"Justin? Is something wrong?" I can see the worry in her voice and I can't help but answer

"Um, Nah, I just don't want to be close to you it's weird… wait that came out wrong, I mean, um, well" It all came out one big babble and I said all the things I shouldn't of. I saw the anger in Hollies face as she gets up and leaves straight for the door. I get up and follow Hollie out the door when Jaden takes me by the shirts and turns me around,

"Mate, she's mine" this was classic Jaden, marking what's his, telling me I can't do what I like. I start to walk back to hollie when I feel Jaden once again push on my shirt. But this time it's hard and he pushes me against the wall, "I'm not kidding…" he hisses at me whilst I fumble to the ground. He walks of whilst I'm still panting.

I get my balance I start to walk out to hollie and I see her face sad and teary,

"Hollie you know I didn't mean it that way, I love you; it's just a little awkward with Jaden at the moment." I saw whilst touching the lump on my back where I got hit against the wall.

"Why? I don't get it? Can't we just all act normal or should I go back to Stratford am I becoming a distraction?" she replies, I can hear the hurt in her voice.

"Distraction to Jaden" I mummer back to her, and I can tell Hollie pretends not to hear it. I try to change the topic; I have to get to sound check anyways

"No baby, come-on, I need to finish sound check, get ready for tonight, wear something hot" I say whilst winking at Hollie and walking off.

When the concert is over I can't help but run back stage and the first thing I want to do is find Hollie. Tonight was great concert; I blew everyone away, not one mistake.

"It was amazing! One of the best I've seen, jeez you where amazing" Hollie yells from across the room as I walk towards her. I grab her by the shoulders and give her a small kiss on the cheek. I am interrupted by the flash of light and a laugh from scooter.

"This is going on twitter biebs" I sigh when I realise he took a picture. I grab the camera off him and can't believe how amazing hollie looks "hey let me see that, wow hollie you look stunning" when the words rolled out of my mouth I didn't actually believed I said them.

"Justin, Stop flirting with your best friend its weird" I think about how to react in a funny way and come up with an idea

"Is this flirting for ya" I go in for a huge hug and I lift her off the ground, I hear her squealing and laughing "Justin stop messing around, you'll drop me!"

I see scooters face as I place her down "Oh you two, let's go back to the hotel watch a movie or something?"

When we get to the hotel it was five stars, as always. After I have a shower I get into some boxers I go find Hollie and we go into my room.

"Image how many girls are jealous of us right now, staying the same room?" I say whilst giving her a hug and place her down on the sofa

"It's a connecting room, I'm physically not in your room" Hollie says with a chuckle.

"What movie do you wanna watch? Never say never?" I say sarcastically, thinking Hollie would never want to watch that, but when I see her eyes light up I know it was a bad decision

"Actually yes please" I laugh when I hear her say it but I don't argue. I place my hand over her as we curl up on the couch. But guess who walks though the door, Jaden he mouths me the words "watch it" and joins us down on the couch. I look down and Hollie was fast asleep on my lap. I just wanted to wake her up and tell her how much I loved her and how I couldn't live without her, but it's too late now… maybe forever.


	21. Chapter 21

I knew what it was straight away, Ive grown up with it. Doctors, checkups, emergency room… Cancer. I didn't know how to react. When I found out my mum was sick, I just cried and stood by her. This is different though, this is Justin, my boyfriend. I want to stand by him, all I wanted to do was cry, but I knew what this would do to him, his career, and his life. I stood in the hallway and my legs where shaking as I could hear the whimpers of Justin behind me. I can't believe Issy didn't tell me, Scooter or Jaden. I turned to see Justin behind me; I could see the tears still on his cheeks and the redness underneath his eyes. I wanted to just run up to him and kiss his lips but it didn't feel right. I was angry, why was I the last to know.

I opened the door of the hotel room and I can feel Justin staring at me from down the corridor. I slammed the door behind me and I could feel their entire eyes look at me. Jaden, Issy, Scooter and Kenny. I could see the expression on Issy's face she knew she let me down.

"How could you!" I wailed at them, who sat in silence on the couch. The tears didn't stop when they started my whole face was wet when I screamed at them. "He's my boyfriend, and you didn't even tell me!" I screamed at Issy as I walked over to her, looking at her eye to eye. I could see the pain in her face as she started to cry as well.

"Hollie, settle we wanted to tell you but Justin wanted to!" Justin wanted to sure that's why he told me sooner? That was all that ran through my mind. I couldn't hold anything back anymore,

"Seriously Scooter, I don't care. He's my boyfriend I should know before all of you. He even told my best friend before me" I stopped I had to let out a wail of tears before I could talk for any longer, I walked towards the dining table and saw flowers. A small pretty floral card was attached,

_**I hope you will fight through, Never say Never  
>- Willow Smith<strong>_

I ripped the card up in my hands, tearing it to pieces, who else knew did everyone else know except for me.

"Willow?" I whispered as I placed my hand to the glass of flowers, I could see Jaden getting up of his seat to calm me down,

"Is he going to die to, like my mum?" I screamed so loud, I could hear myself echo. I let my hand go and smashed the flowers off the table, breaking on the floor. I could hear the gasp from every direction from the room, but the one behind me was different. The huskiness of his voice was not Scooter or Kenny's. The person standing behind me was Justin.

I turned to see his chestnut eyes looking into mine I couldn't help but not notice the blackness under his eyes. He reached out and pulled me closer with my waist. He put his hand through my long, layered blonde hair whilst playing with my fingers. "I need to talk to you," He whispered whilst placing his hand entwine with mine and leading me to his bedroom.

As he sat me down on the bed and as he tried to open his mouth all that came out was a choking noise. I looked at him to see what was going on, and all I could see was him going blue. I screamed for Scooter and as he rushed in the room, he grabbed Justin and picked him up. He ran out of the room, closed the door behind me and left the hotel room. Issy came rushing in and took my by the hand and tried to get me up,

"Hollie, Justin is sick; we need to go to the hospital!" She yelled at me, but I sat and shock my head. I didn't want to move, I wasn't going to move…


	22. Chapter 22

All of the hospital walls looked the same to me smelled the same and felt the same. It was like a home to me, even though we were still in Fiji, hospitals where what I breathed. It was suffocating though, knowing that whenever I was there something was wrong. I walk down the hall and I can her screaming, Justin. I look at Kenny who is next to me, but I can see the pain on his face as he looks to the ground.

I walk slowly down the hall, to where I see him lying in bed, eyes closed but I can still tell he is crying. He doesn't notice me standing there watching him, I don't think I want him too. I see Scooter looking at me from across the room and he waves me in. I look down at my feet, I don't want to go through this again, and should I just leave. But I know I can't I'm in love with him, I wouldn't have anything without him. I open the door slowly and I can see him open his eyes, they are all red.

I walk over to the end of the bed I can see all the wires and the medicine. Why does this happen to him? I see him sit up in his bed and move over for me to sit down. I shake my head I don't want him to touch me. He looks at me confused I can see him trying to read me like a book. "Hollie?" He says husky and how I love it. It is so soft I can feel him trying to think about what to say to me, but he just lies there helpless.

"Does Pattie know?" I say looking at scooter I didn't want to ask Justin. Scooter looks up and nods, I have never seen scooter like this I don't think I have seen anyone like this. The door opens and the doctor walks in and starts fiddling with Justin's machines. He looks up at me and smiles,

"Are you Hollie? I have heard a lot about you, Justin can't stop talking about you" I felt the pain wash through my body. _**Can't stop talking about me?**_ I looked up at him whilst the tears rolled down my cheeks. I looked over at Justin and I couldn't help but start to walk over to his side. He looked at me surprised and gave me one of those crooked smiles that made me melt. I took his hand it was ice cold matching his expression.

The doctor came over and asked me out of the room, leaving me and him standing in the corridor.

"I need you to tell Justin something, Ms Stewart" _Ms Stewart I thought to myself_. "Call me Hollie, and what is it, something worse than my boyfriend having cancer!" I raised my voice as I replied. He looked at me concerned and I could tell he was trying to phase it right.

"I want you to tell him Ms St… I mean Hollie, that Justin is going lose his, uh voice" I felt it, the pain again wash through my body, it felt like I was drowning. I gasped for air, feeling my whole body get dizzy. "What, what else do you want to take away?" I screamed at him, and I could feel the nurses down the hall turn around and look, "If the treatment goes well it will be only for a short period, but he will have to lose his hair" I knew that was coming so I raced back to Justin's hospital room and rushed over to him, "Everyone out!" I demanded and no one argued.

I moved close to his side and pulled up the chair beside him, he took my hand and kissed the palm. I looked at him, and didn't know where the start. All I had was the erg to kiss him, touch him, and feel him. I moved closer to him so I could see the colour in his eyes that I loved. "Justin," I said, he looked up at me those pouted lips got me every time. I opened my mouth but he stopped me with his fingers "I know Hollie you don't have to say it" He knew, then why did the doctor tell me. He must have wanted me to talk to Justin to get us in a room alone.

I moved close to him so I could feel his breath on top of me. I leaned in slowly, as did he. Both lost in each other's arms, eyes closed, our lips locked together. His lips were like nothing I've never felt before, this kiss felt so different. His kiss so passionate so warm, the only thought that ran through my head were those three little words that described what I felt to Justin, I love you.


	23. Chapter 23

_**A Justin Bieber Love Story**_

I remember on my way to the airport to see Justin for the first time in a month and trying to find him around the crowd of hundreds trying to find him first. I knew then that it would I could never be his friend like I used to anymore. I called out his name and I heard no answer above the screaming girls. I got pushing and shoved and I just gave up, I couldn't careless anymore to see Justin. I remember walking to the bathrooms and sitting the empty stall crying, looking in my bag finding an old book from Jim Rohn and reading over and over again one line, that was just like my life_"The walls we build around us to keep out the sadness also keep out the joy"._

The tears ran down my face once again as all the forgotten memories flushed back into my life. I couldn't help but feel dizzy with all the things that were running through my mind and I felt physically ill. Justin was awake know I could feel his gaze staring at me so hard it felt like knives. I didn't want to look at him though he knew I was crying and he knew I didn't want to talk about it. He reached over and took my hand; I turned to see his face so white it looked blue. I placed my hand on his face as I felt his tears too. I could see that it was early morning because it was still not daylight yet; I loved this time of day. He tried to kiss me but I leaned away, why I would lean away. Now he knows, he knows I'm upset, I would always kiss him when I'm okay and he knows when I'm not.

"Are you okay?" He asked as he played with the ends of my hair by wrapping them around his fingers and curling them. I looked up at his chestnuts eyes and all I want to say was the truth but I knew I couldn't. "Yeah offcourse" I replied whilst grabbing the back of his head and kissing his lips. It felt bad like there was no connection. As my lips moved on top of his all I was feeling was selfish no butterflies just totally and utterly selfish. I felt so selfish, knowing that all the beliebers out there would probably live in the slums of India to get a kiss off him and I was doing it with regret. Girls all over the world do anything to just meet him or to see his smile, but I see it every day whenever I want, I can text him or call him at any time or place but as I think about it, I would probably give it up to be back in Stratford two years ago as friends.

I want it to be like movies, when you think that everything had a happy ending. I wanted it to feel like when you kissed the right guy fireworks went off in the back of your throat urging you to kiss more. Don't get me wrong, I love Justin I want to kiss him, well I used to. I liked it when we were young and we used to joke about having our first kiss together but we both knew deep down we weren't joking. Or when we used to fight and hate it so bad it hurt us, we hated fighting so much we would run to each other's house and say sorry a million times to make it all better.

I pulled away from Justin's lips and as I did it wasn't the other thing. I felt the clump of hair in my hand and the expression on Justin's face. I looked at him and I could see that he must have just started chemo. The tears started again, like a water fall and I couldn't bare to look at him anymore, it made me feel worse for him and made me feel bad about myself. I ran down the hospital corridor as I could hear his call from behind me. I was used to this running away from him, running away from life. I knew my way around the hospital surprisingly but it wasn't anything new, they were all the same.

I ran into the disabled toilets and locked it behind me not noticing the lights were off. I stumbled around trying to find the switch and failing. But it didn't matter someone was already there turning it on for me. I turned to see who it was, but I wasn't scared in any way though, I don't think I would mind if there was an ex murder standing there.

To my surprise it was a boy maybe one year younger than me, no hair and scars everywhere. He was looking at me like I would look at myself; it felt like he was reading me like a book. I walked over to him and slid down the wall so I was sitting with my knees hugged to my chest and staring at him. He took my hand and moved my sleeve down my hand and nodded, "You don't cut I see" he seemed surprised and smiled a bit; I looked at him and raised an eyebrow when I saw the scars stretching from his wrist to his shoulder. "Hi, I'm Charlie and you don't have to introduce yourself, I know who you are hollie Stewart." His name Charlie didn't match his appearance at all; he didn't look sweet like the name Charlie sounded like. He was buff but pale and I would image he would have dark brown hair, but I don't know for sure.

I knew he knew my name when he saw me, I could feel it. Most people know who, what I am, they know my every move. "You're not happy are you?" he said whilst looking at me with his bright green eyes, how did he know? He placed his arm on my leg and whispered in my ear, like there were others in the bathroom, "Why don't you break up with him?" he was talking about Justin offcourse and I can't believe I had to think about it, is that wrong? "I love him I couldn't" he looked at me he could see the pain in my eyes like I could see it in his. I touched his head and close my eyes; under my fingers I could feel the scars and the stiches not only on his head but underneath that too. "Do you love him" he said whilst taking my hand off his head and he placed it in his _**"or what he used to be?"**_

I knew I had to go back to see Justin he would be worrying, I got up off Charlie and walked for the door. Before I turned the knob and unlocked the lock I look behind me and mouthed _**"What he used to be" **_I walked along the corridor and couldn't get a song out of my head 'born to be somebody'. I knew I had to tell Justin and I knew that I would do I now. I started to walk faster along the corridor I knew that this was the time; I would pour my heart out to him. I started to run down the hallway and quickly opened the door of his room but there was someone else there on the end of his bed. I could see she had beautiful hair as it raced down her back and she had the longest skinny legs every, she was stunning. As she turned around and she smiled at me I knew who she was straight away and I knew that it wasn't something to be happy about, _**"Hi I'm Selena Gomez"**_


	24. Chapter 24

It's funny because I never ever get jealous of anyone Justin hangs with; most of them are super models with their hands all over Justin. But its weird Selena is different, she has perfect hair, perfect legs, perfect teeth, and perfect face and well for me I'm far from anything perfect. I know I'm not ugly though, Justin tells me all the time, he says I'm the most beautiful girl he has ever seen but I know that's not sure. He looks at Selena differently; he doesn't look at me the way he looks at her. I know when Justin thinks someone's hot and I'm so positive he thinks she is.

She turned and looked at me and stood up to say hello. She was wearing ripped jeans and a cropped singlet with her boobs hanging out; I _**wasn't the only one who**_ noticed what she was wearing. Justin smiled when he saw me and I could see his whole face light up. I loved when he did that. Selena gave me a hug and started talking to me, but I didn't really take any notice the only thing running through my mind was what where they talking about when I wasn't there.

As Selena was talking to me I rudely looked down at my phone scrolling through my texts, just so she would get that I didn't want to talk to her. Selena raised her eyebrow and walked off pulling up a chair beside Justin and smiling at him. Wow she looked stunning. I couldn't care less though, I would be fine if he cheated on me with her, but I know he never would though. I looked at the door so I didn't have to watch the pain of them talking, anything was better than that.

"Hollie come here" I heard Justin's weak voice across the room, he moved across the bed making room for me. But I didn't sit next to him I stood at the end of the bed playing with the railing. I saw the expression on Selena's face but the thing was I couldn't give a shit. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her and puff my cheeks she knew I didn't like her. "Me and Selena are going catch a movie, you in?" He said whilst reaching over and grabbing my hand. He pushed me back down on his bed whilst sitting up and playing with my hands. He felt so cold, like I did. I looked at Selena her smile was so big it felt fake. I didn't want to go, he knew that too but I didn't know how to tell him. "Its fine Hollie, I know you not feeling too well" he said whilst kissing me on the cheek. I wasn't sick he knew that.

"We'll see you when we are back" Selena said whilst smiling, it felt like she was being passive aggressive, but maybe it was just her personality. I looked at Justin and looked down his body, guess whose hands were in his, not mine. "Wait" I called after them, I took Justin's hand taking it from Selena's grip. I took the back of Justin's neck the way he liked it and placed my lips on top of his. I really meant this kiss, it felt different, and it felt good. As my lips unfolded on top of his I could feel his heart as I moved closer to his chest. He pulled away and looked me in the eyes, "I missed this" he said whilst giving me one last peck before walking back down the hall, but he didn't see me mouth back _**I missed you.**_

I walked down the hall after they left, I didn't really know what else to do. I walked along the corridor seeing one by one all of the sick kids walk towards me. I felt bad being there, walking along the corridor whilst all the sick kids look at me with envy, but if they knew how I felt I don't think they would be so envious. I look through all the windows and stopped and smiled when I come across the same boy I talked to in the disabled toilets just before, Charlie. I open the door and found his room empty, just a bed some chairs and books, no friends or flowers. I look around and closed the door behind me, when he notices I came in he raises his eyebrow. "You missed me that much you had to come back" He said whilst getting up out of bed turning away from me, I look over at him realising he had no pants on and quickly look away. "Hey babe, everyone at this joint has seem me naked, remember I have cancer" I didn't know what to say, I felt bad but I didn't know if he wanted me to laugh. I sat in the empty chair facing the window and I couldn't help but keep a smile on my face, "You cheery, why?" He said whilst pulling the chair up next to me, and looks at me. You should of seen what he was wearing, his black washed out jeans, white v neck and flanny with on button done up. He looked better than yesterday, not that little boy in the disabled dark toilet before but like a man. "Justin" I said to answer his question and he gave me a cute crooked smile, the ones Justin used to give me.

I looked around the room not noticing any cards, balloons or sign of anyone around. "I know what you wondering, yeah I have no parents been living on the street my whole life, until I found out I had cancer five years ago and now this is where I live." My mouth dropped as I could see the weakness behind his hard frame. I didn't know what to say so I just looked down. He put his fingers on my chin and lifted my head so it was level with his "its normal for me" he said whilst putting his fingers through my hair. It didn't feel awkward at all though, I kind of liked it.

I sat looking out the window for a while whilst Charlie looked at me. It was weird the way he looked at me, it was kind of like he wanted to know everything about me "You like staring at me" I said after he had been for over ten minutes and I let out a laugh. "Your interesting" I let out a laugh once again "I am the lest interesting person ever" I said whilst looking out the window laughing to myself. "You know hollie, you underestimate yourself a lot" I thought about it when he said it to me in complete seriousness.

"Can I ask you something" I said whilst moving my chair closer to him so my legs where in between his. "Have you had a girlfriend?" I say whilst he looks up at me and smiles "No" he laughs about it then gives me another cute smile, I take his hands and place them in mine "Well, there is no reason why you shouldn't". I looked away this time I didn't want to see his reaction. "You know what Hollie… you deserve better than Justin" he went silent then moved closer to my ear and whispered _**"you deserve me"**_


	25. Chapter 25

Justin's Perspective 

I didn't want to leave Hollie, but I knew she didn't want to come to the movies with me and Selena, most people didn't. I had known Selena for what seemed like forever, she was stunning I knew that, and sadly so did she. She was no hollie to me though, she might have had prettier hair then Hollie but I didn't want to brush my fingers through it. She might have had better skin but I didn't want to place my hands on it. She might have legs up to the sky but I surely didn't want to touch them. But the thing was she didn't know this.

After I walked out of the hospital room I looked behind me and saw Hollie walking along the other way. I told Selena I needed to go to the bathroom and followed behind her without her knowing. Hollie was changing I could see it in her smile but I knew I was too. I followed her along the empty corridor and she turned into a room I could see the huge smile on her face, one I haven't seen for a while. I hid behind the corner only slightly being able to sneak a peek of what she was doing. She was with a boy, a man, a sick one and she looked happier with him then when she was with me. They were talking and I knew I had to get back to Selena because I knew she would be wondering where I was, but as I left and as the water filled in my eyes I could hear the faint words _**"you deserve me". **_

_I knew that guy was bad luck, I didn't like him but I couldn't say the same about hollie. I saw Selena smiling at the end of the hall about to walk into the car, this time she did look beautiful to me. I took her by the waist and she looked at me by surprise but I saw behind her confused look she wanted this. The movie started and all I could think about was kissing Hollie and that's all I wanted to do. I didn't know how but my hand was on Selena's knee and hers were on mine but a lot higher. _

_She moved her face closer to mine and moved closer to me so her legs where over my lap. She took my face and put it by her nose and she ran her fingers through my hair, like Hollie used to do. She tried to kiss me but I backed away, I had a girlfriend I couldn't, but who knew she could be kissing that boy back at the hospital, _

_"Do you want to kiss me?" Selena said seductively as her hands were searching under my top. I couldn't say no and I closed my eyes and started kissing her lips. I didn't want to kiss her, and I think she knew that too. She wouldn't stop either I tried to pull away but she had such a firm grip on me I could hardly breath. Before I knew it the movie was over and she was tired, and I was panting for air. I could see how happy she was, that she kissed me but I could see that she knew how __**unhappy**__ I was. _

_Hollie's Perspective _

Its funny how the mood changed after he said that, I didn't know where to look, but I knew he was looking at me. I really wanted to kiss him, even though I knew how I couldn't. All I could think about was grabbing his face and planting my lips on top of his, no worries. But I couldn't do that to Justin I knew he loved me so I got up and walked out of the room. I knew if I stayed any longer I would have kissed him and other things… I waved to him goodbye and gave a sweet smile, he did the same back and I knew he didn't want me to leave.

I had nothing to do, Justin and Selena took forever at the movies, it had already been four hours and it was around 11 o'clock at night. But as I lay down on Justin's bed and tried to fall asleep I could hear them walking down the hall, "Tonight was fun!" Selena said as putting on a fake giggle but Justin didn't say anything back, which I found odd, "Could we not tell Hollie about tonight" I sat up as soon as I heard him saying this and I crept out of bed and looked down the corridor, she had him pinned against the door and was playing with his hair. The tears filled in my eyes, I wasn't over Justin at all but he sure was over me. I walked towards the wall and slid down it, I felt nothing.

"Hollie what are you still doing up?" I looked up at him and he could see that I had been crying. "What's wrong Darl" Selena said whilst placing one hand on the door and leaning against it, I knew she couldn't give a shit what was wrong. Justin looked down at his feet and Selena got her bag and started to walk away. But she took one look at me and turned right back around, "Bye Justin text you later" She said whilst grabbing him and kissing him firmly on the lips "and you too hollie" she said and gave me a wicked smile.

I couldn't even look at Him, I didn't even want to. I grabbed my laptop and charged for the door but Justin slammed it behind him, "Can I go!" I yelled at Justin but he shook his head, "Then what, you want me to stay here and hear how much you are sorry, how much you want me back, well I don't give a fuc…" I trailed off, I didn't want to swear I never did and I couldn't in front of Justin. "I didn't know what happened but I have no feelings for her, and I heard you and that guy down the hall he deserves you or some crap?" I looked at him; I couldn't believe it he was spying on me? "He is sick Justin and I was just making friend, it's not like your giving me any attention?" I knew what Justin was going to say back to that and I braced for it "I'm sick too…" I knew he was but he didn't seem like it. "I used to be in love with you!" I screamed at him as the tears rolled down my face, he didn't even look at me, all he could do was play with his fingers, "You can't even look me in the eyes, you Bastard?" I said as I pulled my hand back but before I could hit him Scooter walked through the door.

"Hollie stop! What are you doing…?" He looked at Justin and then looked back at me "What did you do to Justin? He's sick remember, stop being selfish" I couldn't believe it; I couldn't believe any of it. "Me, me being selfish, well why don't you tell my boyfriend" I paused "Ex-boyfriend, how nice it was to kiss Selena, make out with Selena and who knows probably had sex with Selena too?" Scooter looked at Justin in shock and still no word from him, "I can't take this!" I screamed I ran out the room and charged down the hall way, "and for hell sake, don't you dare follow me… I don't think you will be following me all the way to Stratford, will you?"

Justin's Perspective 

_**She was gone just like that, like everything in my life, taken/stolen/took/left/broken from me… **_


	26. Chapter 26

Hollie POV

I didn't want to leave him, leaving means saying your goodbyes. I walked down the packed corridor, but to me it felt empty. I knew I couldn't stay here, I couldn't let myself suffer anymore then it had. I felt so much pain, I had to release it. I rushed to the empty disabled toilets, everything reminded me of Charlie. I looked around making sure he wasn't behind me, watching me again. I dimmed the lights I didn't want to see my tears staring back at me in the mirror. I reached down into my bag looking for something, something sharp. I found an old razor, it was rusty and looked unsafe to use, but I was lost I didn't care.

I started to hear things _**you're not happy are you?**_ "No!" I screamed at myself as I smashed my hands at the mirror. Small pieces of glass covered my hands the blood was so red it look fake. _**You don't cut I see **_"NOT FOR LONG" I said as I plunged the razor down my arm, watching it dig deep into my fragile skin. The tears rolled down my face, as so did the blood down my forearm.

I sank down the dirty wall and looked down as my vision started to blur. I traced the cuts I made with my fingers. It was so deep; it felt like I was looking into my bones. It felt good; I was control of this little thing, it felt amazing. I reached along the floor, as I scattered my blood along the bathroom floor. It was covering it like a blanket, think and red. I got the razer and once again slowly and deeply raced it over my skin. I laughed as I did it, like it was a game to me. "Let's see how far I can go" I said, playing a game against my brain and my body.

"Stop" I heard, as I bright light came from the door and familiar noise said to me. "Who's there" I said as I looked around and heard the door lock. "Charlie" I felt sick, and I knew he did too. "Don't come near me" I screamed as I moved my arms around and kicking my feet. "Trust me, that's not what I want to do" his voice was so soft it felt like I was sleeping.

Charlie POV 

It was the worst I had seen, seen someone cutting. The room was completely red, the white walls weren't that colour anymore. I rushed to her side, as I got toilet paper and pushed it against her wound. She was crying and she was acting like she was high, _**high on the adrenalin**_ of cutting I thought.

They finally stopped bleeding and I took the toilet paper off, they were so deep. I looked up at her and her eyes were closed, "Shit, Hollie wake up darling, hollie?" I shook her and she didn't seem to move. I shook her louder and she looked straight up at me, her eyes looked like crystals. I raced my fingers down her cuts and it seemed to hurt her. I took my hand off when she let out a yelp "please touch them, I like the pain!" I looked at her in shook, she was so messed up, worse than me. "You only like that type of pain, try having cancer then you know pain!" I said as I rested my hand on her upper thigh and moved closer to her face. She was teasing me, I knew it. She was playing with her lips; she knew I wanted to kiss them long and hard.

I grabbed her face and folded my lips on top of hers. I took my hands and grasped her waist. She felt so cold, I thought as my hands slid under the bottom of her top. She let out a moan as I started to kiss her neck as my grasp became harder. I stopped kissing her and looked deep into her eyes, she looked scared "are you okay?" I said panting; I was so out of breath. She nodded as she occupied my lips once again. I took my hand and rested it on her chest as I unbuttoned her top. She slipped her hands underneath mine, her touch felt so incredible. I took her top off, exposing her body. She was flawless and I could see she felt self conscious, "you're beautiful" I said as I ran my hands down her chest and stomach.

I started to kiss her again, but this time it felt different. She felt hesitant but when I leaned away, she kept holding me tight, "I want you" she whispered in my ear "are you sure" I knew what she wanted, but I wanted to be sure just in case, "I want to have sex with you" her voice was so faint I thought I was dreaming. I took her over my body and started to unbuckle her belt, but before I could slide her paints of her legs she kicked me off. I looked at her confused and alarmed, "It's okay Hollie, I know you don't want to, you have a boyfriend and I respect that" I said as I pulled my top down and sat down, holding her hands. She was crying again.

Hollie POV

I wanted him, I wanted all of him but I couldn't. I couldn't give myself to him. I burst out in tears and I felt the pain wash over me again. I didn't want to think he did something wrong, he was perfect he treated me how I wanted. "I'm not a virgin!" I screamed at him, pulling my hands away from his, he nodded he didn't seem to mind "I'm not either; I know you and Justin have probably been intimate for like ever." He thought I have done it with Justin, and for a while? It made me feel sick, that he thought I would give myself to him, Justin.

"I'm Christian" I said in a whimper, it felt bad saying it. He must of thought I turned my back on my religion, "Hollie no bodies perfect" it was so cliché but it was so true. "Who did you give it to then?" he asked as he took my hands again, I didn't want to say, I hadn't told anybody. "I don't know" I replied as the tears where flowing once again. He looked at me confused "you don't have to lie to me, beautiful" he sounded so innocent; I really wanted to tell him, I didn't want to hold it back anymore.

Charlie POV

She was keeping something from me, something big. "So who was it" I said as I tried to make her smile. She took my face in her hands and looked deep in my eyes. "I told you, I don't know" she breathed heavily and she chocked back her tears "it was taken from me" I knew the exact words that where going to follow, but I didn't want to believe them.

Hollie POV

"_**I was raped" I said as I felt the pain once again. **_


End file.
